Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
  • entries
  • comments
  • views

Checking In



It's been a minute since I've blogged, but I've missed it. It's nice to have a place to vent and be honest if nothing else, so huge thank you to this community for being so kind and accepting.


Since I've last blogged, I have started therapy and told Harley, Ivy, and Selina that I'm trying to accept my bisexuality because I've felt a strong attraction to a woman. Harley still has no idea that this woman is her. Ivy took the news much better than I thought she would, and she's been amazing in supporting me as I vent about how frustrated I am by my feelings for Harley.


I feel bad for the way I treat Harley sometimes. I'm so quick to stop talking or suggest we not talk for a bit because my feelings for her are so scary to me. Since I'm in therapy every week now, I admitted to my doctor that I almost feel like I'd rather be alone for the rest of my life than to be with anyone whom would make my family disappointed in me. I know my mom would not approve, my father passed when I was young, and I just--I can't imagine nor bear the pain of disappointing her. She still believes that when therapy is over that I'll be ready to meet a good guy and get married. Not that I would be opposed to meeting a beautiful man, because I wouldn't. I just feel so strongly for Harley right now that I don't know how I could be with anyone else.


It's fine though because therapist and I both agreed that a relationship is the last thing I need. It won't resolve any issue I have, and it may even create more.


I've also gone back to work full time and had a birthday since last post. So...I'm trying? LOL I know my start is so slow, but I'm hoping I get my shit together before the end of the year...





  Report Entry


There are no comments to display.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now