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My journey so far

Nikkita

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It all began back in 2009 when I found this site, I hid it from my hubby for two days.  Then confessed all, which forced me to make my first comment on my sexuality - that at the time I was definitely bi curious.  After arranging to meet up with some of the more local friends I'd made on here.  I went along to my first BiFest in Birmingham, that day after listening to everyone else and being able to freely discuss my thoughts and feelings I realised that yes I was in fact BISEXUAL all along.  I started to come out to people who were the very close near and dear, but hubby asked me to be discreet, as he didn't want bitch fit waves started in his family. I respected that, wasn't too happy about it but I understood and went along with it for him, especially as he was open and supportive in every other way.  

I became like a teenager again, exploring online dating, discovering bi nights at swingers clubs - great for the more casual itch scratching with no strings and you can lock the men out!  Even figured out I'd been harbouring BDSM leanings too, whole new discovery path of joy that has been.  

Went on my first two dates ever, with girls I'd met on dating sites.  Both separately turned into short term casual involvements.  The first a lovely lesbian lady who isn't bifobic, and I'm still friends with even now.  The second was a short lived relationship of sorts, still not 100% on what went wrong but it was fun while it lasted.  Not to mention a string a casual making up for lost time action here and there, with casual involvements.  Every year attending pride and loving that I could be 100% open for one day and not care who knew.  

I even came out to my son, who has been hugely supportive from a young age.  He sees no issue at all with my sexuality or relationship choices - I'm so lucky.  

Then a good year or two of not much, after the short lived serious involvement.  A new dating app for girls came along, and I found my current gf.  We've been together a year and a half ish now.  And so much has changed, hubby eventually told some of his family - which I'm certain lead to his dad feeling comfortable enough to finally out himself too.  I still don't dance naked shouting from the roof tops, but I am more myself and don't have to always make excuses anymore - which is way more comfortable for me.  And means I can be fairly openly public with my sexuality, my neighbours being the last nosy fuckers who gossip and could do damage being left really.  

So that brings me to now.  Where I think I'm approaching the edges of splits ville with the gf, more recently I've realised bits of us as a couple are really unhealthy, toxic even.  I knew from the start we wouldn't last forever, as I was her first ... but I guess it's a watch this space and see how it goes.  


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I am excited to hear that you have found yourself.  I hope to be exploring more myself.  I want to get out there are be part of the universe.  The real me.

 

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Thank you for sharing.  I love reading each person's experience with their bisexuality.  I joined this site less than a month ago when I thought I was set on my sexuality, but I soon learned things about myself that I had never given a thought on before, and I'm expecting to be surprised by more.  Wishing you continued fulfillment in your relationships.

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Thank you for sharing.  For those of us still at the early stages of discovery with this lifestyle, this is a powerful reminder that it really can happen and be rewarding as well.

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