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  2. What would be your perfect date if money was no object?? Yes I know you don't NEED to spend money to have the perfect time with her but if there was no limits what would you do, where would you go??? Me---i'd pick her up in a open top sports car and whisk her away to a cabin in the mountains. It would have a lot fire, hot tub outside and views to take your breath away. I surprise her with a champagne picnic and we'd watch the sun set before going into the hot tub to watch the stars. Warming up with the log fire afterwards
  3. Today
  4. If I had to choose, i'd lick. But it'd be nice to recieve ^u^
  5. They can't be deleted. If you need a break, just remove anything on your profile that you don't want seen, then log off.
  6. I am curious about whether an account can be deactivated/deleted for a small amount of time/permanently? If deactivated can comments and threads be deleted. I have enjoyed being on shybi and have made some amazing friends. I am just going through a tough time at the moment with real world issues. At the same time I am feeling embarrassed about some comments I wrote. I just think that maybe I am not cut out for online friendships/relationships on open forums as a whole. I get easily emotionally attached and vulnerable then if people were to leave suddenly/ghost me it has an impact on me. it has happened so frequently that I feel numbness rather than pain I was hoping I could temporarily deactivate my account so some comments would not be visible and I could take a break Thanks in advance and thanks for the support on here
  7. Ive been missing your comments ChemFem. Everyone has given great advice. I would distract your friend, be there for her and let time heal the wound. There would be feelings of guilt and they might need someone to express those feelings. I have had a recent incident of a friend attempting suicide. It has sent ripples through our already vulnerable community as mental health and suicide ideation is more common than we think among LGBTQ individuals. I have a lesbian friend who lives overseas in a country where being gay is a crime. She is a British and American citizen. Today she told this online group im part of that last week she decided to commit suicide. She was admitted to the intensive care unit and nearly succeeded this time with her attempt. Now she is recovering. She is facing issues with her ex, physical abuse by her father and difficulty with living in an unaccepting society. This made me realise how helpless and out of control I am when it comes to online friends or friends who live faraway. There is a limited amount I can do to help an online friend from a distance other than to provide emotional support. I tried to contact her by phone, email and WhatsApp. I tried to ask her why she did this when she had said she wouldn't. When she has a chance to leave this country. She doesn't want to leave without her family. I think mental health resources/phone lines can also be helpful.
  8. Reliving memories and making new memories...
  9. Oh most definitely....69 wins out...but I do enjoy watching her face and hearing her moans..
  10. This one is for those who have long distant loves who cannot be with them. For people who have been with them through lows and highs. It describes the up and down journey same sex couples have in a world where their love has to pass many tests ******************************* For a few moments you became the cause of my laughter A few moments, the cause of my moist teary eyes The reason I soared in the sky like an uncaged bird The reason I stood grounded instead of drowning in depths of despair With time I have changed Falling, colliding and steadying myself up Ever since I have known you I have been drawn to you Every journey, every place You followed my thoughts like a shadow follows a body People don't recognise me as being alone They see glimpses of you in my eyes They see what I have been lacking searching in the territory of your love I would sacrifice my life Lose whatever I have won Despite the cost and price to give you unconditional love I have broken all my boundaries and barriers With you I have found myself in a new land where my heart sings another tune Where my lips another melody Indifferent to the taunts of the world My heart only bows to you You are the rules I follow my prayers and hymns I recite are your words to me The thirst of many lifetimes Only fulfilled by the nectar of your love Many nights have been spent lost in your eyes From moonlight till the first flicker of sunlight has dawned on our faces My face may be mine but the beauty gracing it is yours A few moments you were my laughter A few moments the moistness in my eyes You became my sky, my ground O soulmate of mine Make me yours Drench the barren land of my heart with the rain of your love I wander from house to house To find refuge for this nomadic heart of mine In the perfumed fragrance of your breath How is it that roses grow among thorns Or that flowers bloom on withered branches With your love I see colours of the rainbow Never seen before With you time freezes into eternal spring I have experienced a number of seasons in my life cruel winter, renewal of spring, promise of the leaves of autumn, warmth of summer with your arrival each feels beautiful I feel the wind brush past my hair Like your breath touching my face My eyes have stayed awake, have cried tears seeking yours among the many oceans and continents that separate us
  11. Hi - yes that’s social anxiety and it’s not easy . I fortunately don’t have that problem at all , but I can empathize . I tend to be drawn to someone like you say in a class . I like everyone to fit in and be comfortable. I’m actually more drawn to quiet people . My bff is opposite me introverted and we compliment each other well . I bring her out of her shell , she makes me meditate lol . When we are together we talk non stop , 1:1 is more my speed though I can walk into a room of strangers and command the room ( not sure if that’s always a positive ) lol keep being you .. here if you want to chat !
  12. I am a “boring “ extrovert lol . I can talk to a cement wall and I guarantee you can coerse it to talk back haha . However , I prefer more 1:1. My life is full and busy with work and family and special times for me consist of walks with a friend , grabbing a coffee or just hanging out chatting . I always make a new friend at the gym .. if in a class and I see a woman to the side I’ll always try to make them feel comfortable. Don’t listen to what those “friends “ say .. empathy is lacking in today’s world . Be true to you , ditch negative people ( life’s too short ) and try to get out a little where you feel most comfortable . Here if you want to chat ...
  13. It’s so true, no matter if there is attraction if you can’t hold a conversation then it all goes outa the window. I can respond if someone asks me something but within a group I struggle to know when to join in and get overwhelmed and annoyed by it all, especially as I’ve gotten older. The whole thing is just so exhausting and if I have made a big effort to socialise I am overstimulated and exhausted for days afterwards. I believe they call it social anxiety.
  14. So these words are not for any one person but for a number of situations. I would like to use nature to show connection between me and those residing long distance who have touched me for eg. my gf , other crushes etc. Nature is an amazing healer and reminder of renewal. Spring after winter, light after dark, sunset after a searing hot day. Of hope after disappointment. Of light after darkness. Of unconditional love winning over indifference or pain/fear/hate. Its also about the societal struggle some forbidden love stories have to overcome. Some do some do not. Whether that be same sex relations not accepted by communities or interracial/interreligious relations or that between married/unmarried people. Love does not need to be consummated for it to exist. Sometimes we can appreciate that moment for what it is. In that case all we can do is enjoy that moment for what it is. Live in that moment and not expect more from tomorrow ************ The miles may have reduced between us but the distance between us is still infinite The world was colourful, full of light When you were near me The world was like a paradise On the sands of time You wrote my name before leaving Our incomplete story One day when the skies are pouring with rain Imagine me in those raindrops clinging to your skin When the summer sun irritates you with its rays Imagine me in those rays warming your skin Whether I express this in words or remain silent Imagine my voice speaking to you Walking on those paths sometimes I collide with your fragrance We keep walking not caring for our destination Heavens surround me but you are not here Stars light the skies, the sun shines its warmth Ive been waiting for you for decades Waiting to quench my thirst An incomplete story sometimes the sky does not meet the ground sometimes the waves on the ocean does not meet the shore sometimes love stories do not reach their decided destination Whether I remain in your gaze or not You reside in a place within me In my final sleep I see you entering and exiting my dreams This journey to quench my thirst will be over Whatever is incomplete will be complete one day The skies have bowed down, everywhere I see flowers bloom as our 2 worlds meet fragrances from the air surround me
  15. Watching a French series called La Mante..The Mantis or The Preying Mantis..poised and ready..lol
  16. This topic is as broad as it sounds. Every day online and in real life we make connections with people. Sometimes we can have crushes but never be able to tell those crushes we like them. Maybe they have an impact on our lives by accepting us for who we are. We may fantasise about them but because we are unsure of their sexual orientation we can never tell them our feelings. Those moments are usually not expressed but repressed within us. So this thread is to post any poems/written words about those unknown faces we could not express ourselves to. Whether those moments or feelings are acknowledged they are still special and mean something. If not as much for the other person then for you. Love, passion etc are amazing feelings to have in those moments we have them Or if you are in a long distance relationship and your special someone is far from you and hard to reach you can post poems/written prose about it here. Sometimes you want to express what you feel to them but time difference/working hours prevent you.
  17. I would say don't give up caliwoman. CA has many awesome women. I was about to give up after many bad experiences with both guys and girls. I learnt a bit from those bad experiences. I was about to settle down with eternal singledom then I met my gf. She has been amazing support and made my life an awesome place blossoming with flowers of hope, joy and happiness compared to the dry barren land it was before. So never give up. I had my first kiss at the age of 30 but I wouldn't have it any other way now
  18. It’s true when they say it’ll come when you aren’t looking, or when you least expect it. I responded to someones post just to show support and maybe become friends. We started talking non stop and finally met in person this past weekend. It was an incredible weekend and I can honestly say that she completes me. I could have never imagined being this happy or finding someone like her, but I did. And I honestly wasn’t expecting it at all. So don’t give up. It’ll happen when you least expect it, too.
  19. Sometimes I accept myself and sometimes I don't. My main problem is I don't know what to call myself. What label to give myself. It feels like a rollercoaster of emotions . At one point im at one side of the pendulum and then im swinging to the other side. Im from a conservative Asian culture so if I can just come out to my main family and some friends that would be enough for me. 1-2 straight friends know. I have come out as bi to them. My problem is I don't know if I am lesbian/bisexual or even asexual with biromantic attractions. My gf is long distance but we have had about 3-4 months together. We stayed in shared accommodation but we got to have moments together on weekends away. I know I enjoyed it with her. I have flirted with plenty of guys and girls online before that. My gf knows I am bi as that is how I labelled myself previously. But for some reason I have not been able to find emotional connection with anyone else in my 30 yrs of living. My first kiss and my first sexual experience was with my gf. I don't know if this is because I am from a conservative community though my parents are relatively liberal minded. I had the opportunity to go out with guys but never pursued it. Before my gf I had met a few other gay girls but didn't feel inclined sexually as I didn't have that emotional connection. I feel like ive been hurt and ghosted so many times in my online relationships that I have become numb to becoming close to someone in real life. Before my gf penetrated through my defences I was genuinely fearful of intimacy. I was ok to touch another but not be touched. The hurt that comes from being rejected after opening yourself emotionally is hard to describe. Cybersex and phone sex was so much easier because as a faceless person I thought . After knowing my gf online for 9 months and then after a month of knowing her in real life did I feel comfortable being less inhibited. I definitiely am more uninhibited online than offline. I am still accepting that I am a sexual being, that I have a sexuality and hopefully one day I will accept my sexual orientation. Whatever that may be. My problem is I don't know if I have enough of an attraction to boys to be considered bisexual. Or if having one relationship with one girl is enough to be lesbian. I didn't seek out a kiss or intimacy till the age of 30. But i have had a sexual experience now so I guess I cant be seen as asexual. My gf and I have been together nearly 1.5 yrs. We have had about 3-4 months together yet I don't crave sexual touch or have had any thoughts of sexual relationships apart from her. I am completely fine with masturbating and having fantasies. I don't know if I am just romantic but not sexual. Maybe I am autosexual lol and I only really like solo sex.
  20. I recommend scissoring. Its pretty hot. @California shy @Cookie. gets you really wet as well
  21. Wish you both the best @California shy and @Cookie. in finding that someone. It is definitely worth it if the right person is found. Someone who understands you and will be there to satisfy your needs emotionally and physically. Someone you can take care of as well
  22. It's been a while since I started this thread and during my time I have gotten to know many amazing married women. I want to thank you all for contributing to this thread and giving your views. It's been really helpful for me as I navigate these fantasies. In a way I've noticed that a relationship between a married woman and unmarried one can be like love in its truest sense. Not possessive, not limiting, not overbearing and about being spontaneous and living in the moment. Surely how any relationship should be. To be honest those fantasies have only intensified with my time here. Now i dont know if i would be the perfect fantasy for a married woman but maybe I could. This is what I've learnt from the thread and forum. 1. That woman should have a life/priorities of her own and not be too overbearing/attached. She should understand that obviously the Married woman has a family and priorities. Polyamory can be a bonus and definitely reduce stress. Don't think too far ahead into the future or dream. Enjoy the spontaneity of the moment. 2. It's important to be cautious about emotional attachment, vulnerability, guilt and hurt. So maybe a fantasy is better a fantasy or it can express itself in other ways in real life. Like maybe through massage, dance, stories or poems. There would be less guilt associated with that then sexual activity 3. A genuine girl friend or a sex buddy. Sticking to either role or both without emotional attachment becoming a part of it if possible. I'm not sure how though? How do you be a genuine gf and care for someone without being emotionally attached. A genuine girl friend would be someone who cares but understands the situation/limits. Would be ideal for someone who has to live in a closet long term. Someone who would share stresses/help out with the Married woman's household responsibilities and be ok with minding/playing with kids if that is a factor. The sex buddy role would be about fulfilling her sexual/romantic and emotional fantasies. Now to accomplish the above without losing yourself in that relationship, causing pain and hurt to others. Any relationship from friendship to romantic should be about adding something of value to someone's life, not taking something away. Or making them feel less about themselves.
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