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  2. I don't know. It seems to present bisexuals as a magical mix of stereotypical gay and straight, masculine and feminine traits: Um, no?
  3. All of that list is true.
  4. Today
  5. That's how I feel too, which is why I used "allowed" in quotes.
  6. In theory it sounds like a good idea -sure He won’t mind but the reality is quite different . Would you be ok if he had a woman/ male friend he was romantically involved with besides you ? Maybe you would ... human emotions are never as simple as people let on ... certain things in life are not able to be shared and those things that aren’t very individualized .. Best to all !
  7. Allowed is a loaded word for me for some reason. I would react very badly if someone told me I wasn’t ‘allowed’ to do something. It’s more about taking his feelings into consideration. Or being honest about mine. And figuring out how both can work. I have known I am bi for at least 15 years now. I had never been in a relationship with a woman or made out with a woman when I met my husband but I told him pretty early on in our relationship. He was ok with it and it really didn't much matter until a few years ago when I had a crush on a close female friend. that ended very badly, but he was there to hold me when I felt like shit because of the way she treated me. I admitted everything I was feeling but he said he already knew. And he didn’t seem bothered by it just hated to see me so upset. at around the same time I also met a wonderful woman right here on shys who lives half way around the world and who was also trying to figure out her sexuality while married to a man. She helped me survive much of this drama, and listened to me try make sense of it for months. We got very close through this process. And when we finally met in person it was magic. I am so lucky to have her in my life. we talk/ message daily and meet in person a few times a year as time and money allows. My husband knows about our relationship and has met her and is cool with it.
  8. lol I guess so!
  9. I stumbled upon this song and I got to say it made me slightly misty eyed, its incredibly beautiful & sad all at the same time.  


  10. Still the same feeling and nothing has changed, we will be together 4 years come October and I'll be travelling to see her for her birthday
  11. Great boost. Thank you.
  12. I thought I was one of the lucky ones at first too. He was supportive and encouraged me to explore, plus the usual threesome request (a firm no!) I entered a romantic relationship with a woman that I'm still friends with. I was very open and honest with him but he couldn't handle it and neither could her husband. We stayed platonic but even this was hard for him, knowing there were feelings there. I handled it badly and became distant. Was overwhelmed at how intensely I felt for her and how consumed I was. He felt like he had to compete for my affection, and I just wanted the freedom he promised me in the beginning, which wasn't possible anymore due to the insecurities he felt about losing me. My marriage will never be the same and it clearly wasn't as strong as I thought to begin with, plus I was upset with him for allowing me to open up to a female relationship and then taking it away. He still tells me he's ok with me having a girlfriend, as long as he's priority, but I know he's not ok and just telling me what I want to hear because he's afraid to lose me. He's jealous and can make it unbearable at times, and the next minute all is well. But I need her! He knows that too. I've given him the option to leave but he wants to stay so I will carry on making this work as long as we can. Now, I keep my feelings to myself and the woman in my life will always be disguised as my friend. It's absolutely not how I wanted this to be but once you've had a taste of a female relationship there really is no going back. If you had to cancel because it's too soon for your partner, that makes me think he isn't as ok with it as he makes out and you should tread carefully. There's every chance you could meet the woman of your dreams so it's understandable that he will be nervous. Keep communication as open as possible and be prepared for a lot of reassurance and hard work. Fingers crossed that you guys can navigate this together. It can be a bumpy road, but hopefully not! Good luck!
  13. Yesterday
  14. @lsroses pretty much said it all. Keep us posted. Goodluck.
  15. In answer to your question on platonic friendships......Yes it is normal, especially when you're best friends. Some women are just very tactile and she clearly appreciates your beauty and is attracted to you. That doesn't mean she has any sexual attraction to you.....she may just enjoy the closeness and intimacy that many of us crave and lack from our (likely male) partners and she's comfortable with you and feels safe doing that. I think it's wonderful that she's been accepting of your sexuality, but I also think it's a little unfair to up the physical contact, knowing that you can easily fall for her. So it makes me wonder if she's doing this because she wants attention, and enjoys the tease, or whether she actually wants something to happen between you. Personally it sounds like she's curious too but clearly adamant that she's straight.....just to avoid confusion or to confirm to herself that she hasn't led you on in any way. Honestly, I've seen this happen before and it will eat you up and confuse you further unless you address it and are more direct in your questioning of what she wants from this friendship. Has she ever kissed a woman before? Does she question the closeness you have? The relationship? The fact that you're the first and last person she thinks about during her day?? All this suggests much more than a friendship but she may not even be aware of it. Is she single or is she also married? The alternative to facing it head on is just to give it time and see where it goes and if you have the patience and emotional strength to let her lead then it could all work out in your favour. In the meantime, enjoy the friendship for how special and rare it is to find such a strong connection, if you can get those fantasies under control. It really is a confusing and emotional situation to be in so keep us posted and I wish you the best of luck.
  16. Love this article! It's so positive and made me smile.....Thanks for sharing
  17. I did a test recently which measured me as 57% Extrovert so I'm a fairly even mix. I'm quite sociable but I get anxious if I don't know many people or I'm out of my comfort zone. I can make conversation with almost anyone, and like meeting new people, but I've also been told that I'm really hard to read at times, so I'm definitely working on that. I'm just hard work so I'm grateful for the few that stick with me and make the effort to figure me out!
  18. So this week has totally been a rough one, I have basically struggled with depression most of my adult life and this week it just felt like I was drowning, everything just try dragging me under. Anyone who doesnt have depression probably cant relate. But dealing with the depression demon just takes it right out of you. 

    Im trying my best to get it together and today is a good day.  I pretty much punched the big D in the face with a chair, threw it in the abyss and hoping it takes a long while to resurface.

    Have a great day Ladies. 

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Nidalaeh


      I love girl. I'm here whenever you need me! 

    3. JadeBleu15


      Thank you Ladies for your kind words its not easy but helps when someone understands. **hugs**

    4. moonbynight


      I understand. Glad you're hitting it with a chair.

  19. I am a Tarheel
  20. I am a mixture of both. I like to be around people but enjoy my alone time. Does that make me a bi-trovert?
  21. I need to quit feeling sorry for myself and get myself together and live my life & not merely exist. I want to LIVE

    1. JadeBleu15


      This song reminds me of someone. I forgot to put that on the original post. 

    2. NatashaYork


      I so love this song :music:

  23. Great article, thanks for posting. :-)
  24. We look back and reflect on those who hurt us, admittedly adding to already present damage, and we have to learn from this, lonely as it is, the need to protect ourselves from further damage is just so paramount. In fear we move forward, little steps, retreating when more potential damage shows its face, ever alert, wary. Step by step, one day at a time....

  25. Ya know, I wonder if we're talking about the right problem here. I live a fair distance from the middle of nowhere, and yet I meet new women all the time. Occasionally at church, sometimes at PTA, sometimes at the market, sometimes at client's offices, or even out for lunch. Unlike an app, I'm never unsure about whether they're women or men. They look pretty womanly to me. I'm not currently looking for a girl friend, but when I was, the problem wasn't meeting women. It was trying to determine which ones might be interested in the same things I was. This was much more than a passing worry because in my conservative corner of the world,the possibility of offending someone, and all the (potentially very) unpleasant consequences of doing so are not to be trivialized. So I'm curious. For those of you who met women you eventually were intimate with, and didn't do so in obviously gay venues (e.g. lesbian bars or dating apps), how did you know, and how were you able to move the relationship beyond the "friend for lunch" stage? Ame
  26. There is a lot of this that resonates with me. And some parts that don't. Something about getting actual serious attention from a woman seems to trigger a deer-in-the-headlights reaction for me, and I just don't know how to respond to it. Which is why I'm so useless at actually getting involved with women.
  27. So much has happened in the last 9 months. I met someone who at first I thought could grow to love but it didnt work out. She wasnt motivated to do a lot with her life and was lazy and even neglected me to the point of not even recognizing my birthday..all of which I started to feel resentment grow immensely. I called it quits..  I wasnt hopeless but felt a great sense of relief and felt like I could breathe again.

    *Skip ahead 3 months*  Ive been honest with myself in what I want and what I would expect even from a friend let alone girlfriend. I started chatting with some one at this time after valentines day and I was glad to make a friend. We talk(ed) daily and I learned SO much about her and she I. Shes motivated, thought provoking, ambitious, fun, flirty and very supportive.  I was surprised how we clicked and how I could be myself around her. Its slightly long distance (she lives 2 hours away..the next state over) but not too far and I am going to meet her in a week or so time.. I NEED advice! lol but all in all I am so happy!

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