Platinum Shy-Bi Girl
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BellaMynx last won the day on December 30 2017

BellaMynx had the most liked content!

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About BellaMynx

  • Rank
  • Birthday 10/16/1983

Profile Information

  • Music
    Lounge-like Brazilian Music
  • Location
  • Interests
    Women, Men, tarot, runes, crystal work, meditation, Buddhism, Yoga, Pilates, kink (ask me about that), polyamory, and more...
  • Signature Fragrance
    Moonlight Sonata and Sweet Pea
  • Favourite Book
    Hamlet by William Shakespeare
  • Favourite TV Show
    K-Dramas, OITNB, Sailor Moon, Archer, Bob's Burgers, gameplays by Dashiegames on YT, GOT, Star Trek
  • Favourite Film
    The Hobbit, LOTR, Harry Potter, and more...

Recent Profile Visitors

11,435 profile views
  1. Hello, ladies! How is everyone? I miss a lot of ya!

    1. blueberry


      We're all still crazy with women! Welcome back! 

    2. JazzyJess21


      hey hey! how have you been?

  2. Just to clarify, polyamory and polygamy are not synonymous. Polygamy deals more with a religious aspect and has a more patriarchal setup. Polyamory is egalitarian and has no religious foundation. Another clarification is that there are many different dynamics in polyamory. I am in a polyamorous relationship. However, my husband and I have a V dynamic. V meaning that my partner is not involved with my husband. He also has a relationship with someone else and they are not my significant other. I suppose our relationship is a Z rather. Bottom line, I will say that jealousy arises in many polyamorous relationships. You just have to keep the line of communication open between all parties. My husband and I once had a closed-triad; however, our girlfriend tried to pit he and I against each other by saying one thing to one partner and denying it in front of the other. So that was an issue among many other issues. I'm not saying it cannot be done, but communication needs to happen for it to work.
  3. Dating is so difficult. Because of ghosting, people make you feel like shit. I swear, I wish people had enough balls to utter the words "I'm not interested." That way I won't waste a face full of makeup and a cute outfit. I waited for that dude to message me that he was ready and he didn't even contact me the whole day. 

    Ugh. Anyway, I am going to try and go out and be around people. I will not sit and fall into a pit of misery. I refuse to do that. It only hurts me and not the other person. 

    1. moonbynight


      I think one way to look at it is that ghosting almost always represents ineffective coping skills. It's not even "I'm not interested". They may be interested, and just not know how to handle it for whatever reason. It still sucks, but try to assume that it is truly them, not you.

    2. BenedettaC


      I'm sorry to hear that. Try to forget about it. It's his loss, not yours...

    3. ChemFem


      Agreed with both. Still in a pain in the ass though. However, you did not waste a face full of makeup and a cute outfit, you graciously bestowed them on the world:air_kiss:

  4. Hey! Welcome! We live in the same city! Well, kinda.
  5. "I knoooooooooow, I knooooooooow for suuuuuuuuuure that life is beautiful around the woooooorld..." I love this song! RHCP are so awesome. Anyway, I've made some important decisions,and I'm going to execute them. 

  6. I'd forgotten about how tedious it is to take care of a new tattoo. Lol! I'm like, "GAHHHH! I want to SCRATCH YOUUUUUUUU!!!! I CAAAAAAN'T!" It's so pretty though!!!! :D

  7. Hey hey! How are you? It has been a while since I've been active on here and I remember seeing many of your posts and stuff. I can't believe I haven't followed you yet! 

    1. wolfbigrl88


      Yup it has been a while. Nice to see you around again :)

  8. I hope all my US Shys had a Happy Independence Day! I nearly burned my fingers off! Yay! Ha ha! Today, I got a new tattoo! I'm so happy how it turned out. Right now I'm bruised up, but once it clears and looks prettier, I shall show a pic. :D

  9. Omg! I'm angry at the guy who left you at the bar alone! What an asshole! (Forgive my foul mouth). I'm so sorry and I don't blame you for closing down your profile. I also suck at flirting with women. Men, I do it unknowingly, but I'm SO scared to move it to the next level. It is scary! I don't know what exactly I'm scared of, but it is completely nerve wrecking. Aww. I wish you the best of luck however you choose to meet your person.
  10. After watching this video again at a conference last weekend, it helped me feel so much better about having the courage to work with people in my new career. It also helped me have a better understanding of why I got angry at people after my father died whenever they kept telling me: "I'll pray for you." or "At least he's in a better place..." Those were band-aide responses I received when I didn't want anyone to effing pray for me or tell me something they had no idea about and made assumptions. The video especially helped me understand my irritation toward people whenever I would reach out to receive some comfort after breaking up with one of my partners or to express that I'm having a difficult time finding a partner, they'd tell me like, "'re still with your husband, right?" In my mind, I"m like, "what made you think I was not with him?" Why is it that whenever a relationship fails with a secondary (I hate using this word because I don't like ranking my partners) or tertiary partner, the relationship with the primary partner is somewhat at fault with the other relationships. What? Seriously? My marriage had nothing to do with the failure of the relationship with my recent exes. Why is this so difficult to understand? Honestly, I think this is why I want to be a counselor and help polyamorous individuals so that they don't feel like there is no one out there who understands them. It makes me think of this in the video: "Rarely, if ever, does an empathic response begin with ' least'...and we do it all the time. Someone just shared something with us that is incredibly painful, and we're trying to 'silverline it' [...] we're trying to put the silver line around it..." ~Brené Brown on Empathy Examples of people who try to Sympathize versus Empathize: Sad person: "I had a miscarriage..." Sympathetic person: "At least you know you can get pregnant." Sad person: "I think my marriage is falling apart..." Sympathetic person: "At least, you have a marriage..." *My personal experiences* Me: "I'm feeling depressed because I miss my father who died four years ago." Sympathetic person: "At least you still have your mother. Think about that." Me: "I'm sad that I haven't found the right second partner, and I'm feeling lonely right now." Sympathetic person: "At least you still have your husband." Here are some examples of being empathetic with a polyamorous person if you aren't poly and have no idea how to relate: For fights: Imagine the last fight you had with your significant other. I'm not talking about the one where you forgave each other within 5 minutes. I'm talking about the one that lasted for quite some time. You felt horrible inside, and that person really hurt you deeply. Think about how that feels. Now relate that to a person who is poly and fought with one of their partners. Every relationship is unique. Deal with the current relationship with which they're upset. Don't discuss the other relationships that have nothing to do with the current one. For breakups: Think about a time you had a nasty break up, or a break up that left you feeling like you'd never find someone else again. Imagine that when trying to comfort someone who is poly and they just had a breakup. Do not discuss a relationship that has nothing to do with the current one the poly person has presented. How would you feel if someone filleted your heart and served it back to you? You'd feel downright crappy, wouldn't you? For aching that they're having trouble meeting other poly people for relationships: Think about how it felt when you were looking for someone to date, and you kept meeting people who were just not right for you. Do you remember how sad that felt? Do you remember that hurt and pain? That is exactly how a poly person would feel. Worry about the current issue. Don't bring in other relationships that have nothing to do with how they currently feel. Poly people hurt too. It's not about whether polyamory works for you or not. It is the person who is hurting that needs some comfort. That is all! I really wish people would understand that instead of assuming that because many of us are married or partnered and that we are automatically sunshine 24/7. We love differently. That's just how I've felt for a long time. This is why I keep to myself because if I try to reach out to anyone, I get those sympathetic comments from people who have no idea how I'm feeling and don't try to understand how much I'm hurting. Namaste, Bella
  11. I wish that people understood the difference between the following things:

    1. Listening to respond vs. listening to understand.

    2. Empathy vs. Sympathy (a blog is in the making right now).

    3. Your vs. You're

    4. Then vs. Than

    5. There vs. their vs. they're

    6. Where vs. we're, vs. were

    7. Antisocial vs. Asocial

    Ok, that latter part is for grammar, but still! Lol! I get a headache when I read memes that misuse those words! It's like, NO! Ha ha! People explain to me that they don't need to worry about grammar when they're being casual. My question to you is, "do you know what those words mean? There are clear differences between those words!" You can't just decide to break the rules of grammar just because you don't feel like using an apostrophe or changing one letter! Typos are one thing, but using completely different words in place of another to intend another meaning is beyond my understanding. Forgive me if this is shallow. 


  12. I wish I had more polyamorous friends. I need to talk with people who won't jump to the conclusion of me not being happy with my husband. It has nothing to do with my husband. It's like wow...

    1. JazzyJess21


      new to the poly thing here...but you are right it has nothing to do with not being happy with him its all about seeking out that other half to you..feeling complete.. having or seeking a gf for yourself doesnt negate the love you have for him.

  13. I'm not bi-curious, but I'm closeted bi as well as a closeted polyamorous person when it comes to my work environment. I work in a profession where if they get wind that you're not heterosexual and monogamous, then you are in for a world of trouble and possible job loss. I live in a VERY religious area, and nearly everyone I work with has issues with LGBTQ+ individuals as well as relationship dynamics other than monogamous. Therefore, it makes dating very difficult for me because some of whom I date want to do so openly, however, I cannot afford that. I am, though, working on leaving such a place where I can live openly and not give a flying fart about people having issues about my orientation or relationship dynamic. I'm getting to the age where I just don't feel it is fair for everyone else to live comfortably around me and I live stuffed in this closet. It's hot and cramped in here!
  14. Hi there! It's been a long time! How have you been?? I'm so glad to see you're on here still!

  15. Random, funny thought: I'd love to date an Englishwoman and call her "my little English muffin" or "my little crumpet" purely as a term of endearment. Although, I think she'd hate me and call me a stupid yank. Lol! 

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. BellaMynx


      Well, if they said it to be a meanie, then I'd understand. Well...then again, it all depends on the person receiving the name too. 

    3. NoOne


      We did our usual back and forth of pet names, and I slid "my little English muffin" in there.  She giggled and said "but I'm not the little one" because she's taller than me and it's a running thing between us to point that fact out as often as possible, teasing and lovingly.  I said "but you're my babygirl" and she said "hmm, yea, true" and giggled some more.  Then I explained the reason I called her it and she was amused and giggled more when I said "crumpet".

    4. BellaMynx


      I just now saw this! Lol! I'm glad it went well! He he!