Hello, ladies. Past member here coming back on after a long break. I hope you'll indulge me a bit on this one...
So, something happened that has me questioning some things. I recently had an interaction with a female first responder. From the moment I saw her, I was entranced. She - tall and athletic build with a strong jawline yet long chestnut hair and a natural, all-American pretty face - embodied all that I find attractive in a woman physically and mentally. She was firm yet compassionate, take-charge yet accommodating, a director and a caretaker. A sort of "perfect" blend (to me) of masculine and feminine, if you will, with her being on the slightly more masculine side of the spectrum. (And, to clarify, it wasn't just the "uniform" - I did my due diligence and sneaked a peek at a few social media photos of her - with her wife, long sigh!-, and she looked amazing no matter what she wore - dresses, soccer uniforms, etc.!)
The thing is I've only ever met or seen (in real life) a handful of women like her, who completely fit my subconscious criteria for an all-encompassing attraction that makes me desire a full-on relationship. I suddenly realized that this might be a big part of the "why" I've only tried one relationship with a woman...I hadn't been exposed to my kind of woman! To test my hypothesis, I downloaded Tinder and started swiping like crazy - out of a hundred+ women, I was only fully intrigued (body, heart and mind) by three. Oy! I started remembering my ex-girlfriend and how much I loved her but how our dynamic never quite felt "right"...which ultimately made me question my sexuality (as opposed to just questioning her and that relationship).
So, now I've got myself thinking...am I bisexual if I have such a narrow desire for a specific type (pretty sure I already know the answer to this!)? And am I "less" (like in a Kinsey scale kind of way) bisexual if so? And even crazier of a thought, am I even more bisexual if so?! (Because this type of woman makes me want to completely engage with her on *every* level!) And lastly...why is this type of woman so poorly represented on dating apps?!
I'm not really expecting anyone to answer my crazy questions, but I would be very grateful to hear any and all thoughts and personal experiences.