Platinum Shy-Bi Girl
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About 2Confused

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  • Birthday 08/12/1994

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  • Music
    Pentatonix, Maren Morris, Emmy Rossum
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  • Interests
    Books, music, video games, and travel
  • Signature Fragrance
    Golden Fairy
  • Favourite Book
    Too many to name
  • Favourite TV Show
    Rizzoli & Isles, Queer as Folk, Ghost Adventures
  • Favourite Film
    The Breakfast Club, Easy A, Police Academy

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  1. Getting close....at a 3 and over 60% effaced. I’m getting excited to see my little man. :)

  2. 8 months along and I, more than likely, will go into labor early.

  3. A lot has happened so I made another update blog “Update 2018 #2”

  4. So I’m 5months along and single and jobless. Last month, I’m chilling in my room talking to my mom on the phone, and I look up and see my boyfriend walking up the stairs. I get excited because I hadn’t seen him for almost two weeks. I tell my mom I’ll call her back and hang up. He hugs me and says the worst words possible. “We need to talk.” So we both sit down and he flat out says, “We need to break up.” I’m too shocked to react as he goes on about us not being right for each other and that he thinks it best if he has time to figure stuff out. He trembling at this point and I reach over and take hold of his hands. He proceeds to say he still wants to be there for the baby and he thinks I must hate him now. I told him that I don’t hate him. We hugged and he got most of his stuff and left. Then everything hit me at once and I called my mom crying and she (being the mama bear she is) got pissed. After getting off the phone with her. I called my best friend and talked about it with her. She helped calm me down and convinced me to go eat something (after finding out I hadn’t eaten since 10 that morning and it was about 9pm when we started talking). I just felt so lost. I didn’t understand and probably won’t understand what went wrong. Over the next few days it started to frustrate me more and more. Why hadn’t he talked to me about how he was feeling beforehand? Why did he go to other people? He got upset with me earlier in our relationship because something happened and I felt I couldn’t say anything to him. So he found out what happened and then got upset that I didn’t communicate because it was all a misunderstanding. So from then on, we had been open books about stuff to each other. Or so I thought... A few more days go by and I found more of his stuff to return and I figured, he said he wanted to be there for our child so I’ll give him a couple of the ultrasound pictures. I put them in a baggie and then put it in on the side of the big bag with the rest of his stuff. I had a couple errands to run that day in the same town so I sent him a text saying what time I’d be up there. Well it started to storm and he wasn’t answering, so I just texted his mom and asked if I could just drop off the stuff at the house. She told me she was absolutely okay with it. So I got there and it was pouring down rain. His dad came out of the house and waved at me to park under the covering. So I did and as I was getting out he (being a nice guy) takes the bag from me to take inside. Then an “oh sh*t” moment happened. I had my back turned head back to my car and his dad stops me and asks if I could come inside for a minute. I kind of thought that was weird, but I obliged. When I got inside his dad was at the bathroom door pounding on it and yelling out my ex’s full name. His mom greeted me and asked me if that was his stuff in the bag and when I looked over (after confirming) I saw the pictures on top of everything. His dad and, now, his mom had seen them. So, not only did he break up with me, he never told his parents about our child, and he didn’t show up to any of the appointments. Well, at this point I’m heartbroken and hormonal. One of the worst mixes of emotions and I ended up getting fired from my job because a comment I made was taken out of context and they wouldn’t even give me a chance to explain. They suspended me and then told me I was okay to come back to work and then fired me when I stepped foot inside the building. So, currently, I’ve been trying to find a desk job and dealing with other stuff going on. Good news is, my parents put an offer on the table for me to live with them once my lease is up, not worry about working, so long as I do some housework, take care of my son (yup, baby is a boy!! ), and go back to school online at their expense. How could I say no to that?
  5. Exciting news in my latest blog entry “Update 2018 (Here lies my crazy life since)” :)

  6. So sh*t happened. The last time I left off, I believe I had quit my job at Panera and gotten a new job at a coffee shop... I ended up quitting the coffee shop after six months. Reasons I quit: they promoted someone with very little food and beverage experience and has never worked with coffee before to assistant manager, they would talk about how they kept their pubic hair and other personal stuff (mind you I wouldn’t care if this was an office setting with no customers coming around or even having a girls’ night, but this is at a freaking drive-thru and there are times we forget to turn our mics off), then I'd be teased about how if I just had sex I wouldn’t be so uptight. Good news is I got another job right away, a better pay and more hours job. And after 3 months, I got another job at another coffee shop, and shortly after I moved into my own place. I was only able to work both for seven months before the coffee place, knowingly, scheduled me during my not available time. But, better news, after two more months, I transferred departments as a “promotion”. Which is when I met my a**hole boyfriend (he’s really a sweetheart, he’s just extremely blunt and sometimes acts spoiled, but he’s mine and I love him). Lol. I didn’t think he even noticed me, until he made a bet with someone about Ed Sheeran being gay. I had to get in on it, so I put my two sense in and was with the other guy’s side (that Ed is not gay). Needless to say, it came down to him against myself and two others and he owed us all energy drinks. After that he and I started talking more and then he started flirting with me. I mean, he was pushy as hell (still is sometimes). Which is really not something I’m used to. It took about a week and a half for him and everybody else to convince me, he liked me. Then I finally agreed to go on a double date with him and two mutual friends that were dating. Although, it ended up being that our first date was a double date with my parents....his pushy self wanted to meet them and asked when he would get to. Then the next day, I meet his parents. We did go on that double date with our friends the follow week. We went to a place with arcade games as well as bowling, laser tag, and pool tables. To our surprise it had a bar in there as well. After he and I had a drink and talked a bit, we went to join our friends for a few games of pool, then we went over and bowled. While we were bowling, one of our friends and I were joking back and forth and she made the comment “you know I love you.” He was sitting in between us and kind of muttered, “she’s not the only one.” I blushed profusely and looked at him for a few seconds, then grabbed his beer and took a few drinks. My heart was racing, and my stomach did flips. We finished the game and left. When he and I got into his vehicle, I looked over at him and he was staring at me. I asked him what he was looking at. He didn’t answer, he just put his hand on the back of my neck and drew me closer to him, then he kissed me (this actually wasn’t our first kiss, our first kiss was when he walked me to my vehicle after work in the rain and when we got there, he wrapped his arms around me and waited until I looked up and kissed me). I felt on fire, this kiss turned into a make-out session. He ended it and said it was getting late and we needed to get back to my place (he was staying the night because it was late and he lives 45 minuets away). Well, I was feeling very turned on, and for some reason, it all felt right. I wasn’t having this internal emotional mess inside like I did with other boyfriends, it felt wrong with them, to the point where kissing was as far as I would go. But with him, it felt right and I wasn’t scared to be alone with him. I felt safe and comfortable (still do). So while we were on our way back to my place, I got kind of devilish and asked him how he was with distractions. He admitted he was fine with them, but he said I better not start something I won’t finish (he knew at the time about my being a virgin and was very respectful about it). So in a small voice, I said back, “what if I do?” He glanced over at me. He didn’t say anything until I leaned closer and put my hand on his leg and slide it up towards the middle of his pants, but stopped then took my hand away and said smiling, “But I may start something you can’t finish.” He grinned and sped up telling me I was in trouble when we got back to my place. But he was gentle with me. He sure took his time reducing me to an absolute mess and but was so gentle with me. Now fast forward a week later, the girl friend that was there on the double date, was getting a group together to have a girls’ night in two days. My boyfriend was over and I was trying to decide 1) if I even wanted to go, and 2) what I was going to wear. So I have this very special, once on occasion, short, form-fitting, white dress. I wasn’t going to wear it out for the girls night, but I was going to tease him. I put it on and walked out into the living room. I barely got the words, “how about this one” out before he backed me up into my room, pushed me onto the bed and very slowly and tantalizingly reduced me to an “unable to think straight” mess. Then proceeded to say this dress was never to be worn out in public without him present. Now fast forward three weeks later, I realized two things, I was getting sick everyday, and I missed my period by three days. It wasn’t all that worrisome for me, considering I had just gotten over having a nasty stomach ulcer and ever since I got off the pill (because any birth control pill I took resulted in gallbladder complications) I would have irregular periods anyway. However, I humored myself and went to the store and bought a test anyway.... I was absolutely shocked that it came up positive, because we had been using condoms. I cried for a good three hours before I fell asleep on the couch. My boyfriend came over after his interview for another job, and woke me up. He asked if I was okay. I told him I wasn’t sure. So he asked if it was something he did. I assured him he didn’t do anything wrong... even though in my head I was saying that he did do something. I told him, “Recently, I’ve been getting sick quite a bit.” His reply, “okay.” “And, I’m three days late...” “Okay.” “Oh, for the love of-” I got up grabbed the test and threw it at him. He looked at it, then looked up at me, kind of smiled, put an arm around my waist and said, “We’re going to be okay.” Of course I started crying again. And he just hugged me. So it’s almost three months later and we’re still together. I’ve got my second OB appt soon. And he’s still happy about it. I’d be lying if I said I’m not happy. He and I are picking out names and disagreeing about some. So we decided that I pick the girl’s name and he picks the boy’s name and we’ll wait until we find out the gender.... unless, I’m having twins......then I might cry again. Lol So, now you’re all caught up.
  7. I did the same thing: romanced a lister as an elf and I got pissed after he breaks up with my character. Lol
  8. Lose a little weight and start doing my makeup and now boys want to take notice?? 

    1. ChemFem


      Yup that's the MO for shallow people

  9. I hear that Oxygen ( O ) was going out with Magnesium ( Mg ) and I was all "OMg" .....
  10. New work, new haircut, and soon, new place :)

    1. myladylove


      Sounds great, good luck.

  11. Thank you! I'm going to some samples of other writings I have as well, as soon as I have time
  12. Here's a little sample of what I'm working on: (let me know what yah think) (also please ignore grammatical errors, as this is just a rough draft, thanks!) There are many different types of people: The nurtures, they want to constantly play mother hen to anybody and everybody they meet; The Fighters, they either won’t give up or are the ones that start it all; The Peacekeepers, those people that hate confrontation and always think there is a solution to it all; The Neutrals, it’s neither this nor that with them, everything just is and they go about their business. Then there is my type: The Mastermind. We are the type of people that other people believe to be the little pieces in the game until proven otherwise by, well, us. We have other names: The shifty people, spies, agents of the dark. Really, we are just people that see the end and find the means to get there. So while I am sitting here in a jail cell, I know in precisely two minutes the Detention Officer, so prideful in his position (obviously somebody new to the justice system with disgustingly high optimism), will walk by my cell and has made the mistake of forgetting to switch the cell keys to his left side, away from the cell doors and handsy prisoners, such as myself. Three…two…one. Buzzing echoes across the building, notifying us of the Officer is gracing us with his presence. Show time. “Talbot! Rise and shine!” Officer Edwin taps his baton against the cold metal of the cell door. “Rather too early for that much cheer, Eddie boy.” I make a show of pulling the pathetic excuse of a blanket closer to my chest, hiding my grabbing the substitute “keys” (a few pennies and metal bits from the yard on a metal ring). Edwin laughed at my expected response and proceeded to hit the door a few more times until I rose from my bed. Carefully tucked in my sleeve, I leaned against the cell door and grabbed the baton stopping the noise and causing him to step closer to my cell. His elbow made contact with my face, just as I finished the exchange. I fell back onto the concrete floor, holding my nose. This was partly to hide the keys by throwing them into my shirt. Mostly because my nose had started to throb in pain. “Hasn’t anybody taught you, Talbot?” His laugh carrying a somewhat malicious tone. “You don’t grab at a man’s stick.” “Yes, heard of that.” I sniffed at the pain, and grinned cockily at him. “But were you not the one knocking at me to rise and shine?” His best response, to spit and mumble a few choice words of being a sick bastard and quickly moved on. Forty-five minutes later, the second buzz announced his departure from the first ground block. Also, cuing the beginning of my escape. Allowing myself time to find the right key and using my pillowcase to muffle the sound of metal against metal. Last night’s mashed potatoes did the trick on the door itself and I silently opened then closed metal without a sound. No need to worry about camera’s or alarms, I had disabled them while Edwin made his rounds earlier. It was a stroke of luck that my confinement was located next to the electrical, just needed a few weeks to get behind the wall and cutting a few choice wires. Sadly, that left me with only two hours to get gone before the young man got back to the security desk and saw the problem. I kept my back flush with the wall as I felt for the loose panel that lead to the area between the walls where the plumbing and electrical ran. My hand hit creating a slight noise, but not enough to disturb my fellow jail mates, taking it off in no time and replacing it once on the other side. Sprinting along the piping to the broiler room took less than eight minutes. Bravo Talbot, a quick congratulatory before pressing on. Only one hour left. This was simply child’s play, dressing up into the janitor’s uniform and walking out with the leftover trash which included my previous attire. Nobody spared so much as a glance. I dumped the bag into the dumpster and walked to the parking lot. Amelia waited for me in the seventy-four Ford, clearly it had seen better days. I slipped into the backseat of the truck and hid myself in the piles of work tools and laundry. In no time we cleared the gate check and drove off. “You sure took your time, Kingsly. Almost just left your sorry ass.” “Such affection from you this early in the morning.” I wiggled myself out of the hiding spot and sat up. “Careful, I’ll start to think you care.” An exasperated sigh from her and an eye roll was my reward. The gray hair peppering her red locks was, in my books, an assault to her youthful spirit. “You took my Xavier’s place in that cell so he could fight for this country.” I could see the bittersweet resolve in her chestnut colored eyes, despite the stonewall expression on her face. “This is the least I can do for that.” An easy silence settled for the remainder of the ride to the private airstrip. Courtesy of Amelia, a helicopter was to meet us with the hour of our arrival. Lucky for us, it was on time. It was waiting for us, with a rather dashing pilot waiting to take me far, far away- or shall I say, it was going to take me back to my country, my home… back to him. The truck comes to a stop on the dirt road. Amelia and I both get out and meet at the back of the truck before the dust settles. She drops the tailgate and grabs two duffle bags handing one- from her reaction the heavier of the two- to me, then closes it. “So, I see you have decided to join me on my flight.” We reach the helicopter and toss our bags in. She turns and tosses her keys to the pilot. “Good thing I am, I’ll be the pilot today.” She smirks at me, taking hold of the door to pull herself into the cockpit.
  13. What are you craving right now??? I'm craving some cheese fries with salsa...
  14. WARNING: before reading this, make sure to keep ice on hand for the headach that might ensue from facepalming multiple times while reading. You have been warned. So.... I am quitting Panera, not going to culinary school, possibly not doing any schooling, getting a new full-time job, possibly another full-time job for night, and moving out on my own. My job enviroment has just gotten batsh** crazy and I blame it on Hell breaking loose. My general manager is preggers and has hit an all time hormones high, where being a b**ch to your employees is the new way to run your store. We are a training store so of course we will be the ones to train new managers that go to other stores as well as shift supervisors. And you know there are always going to be the ones that are total dicks and can't do anything...well that just seems to be all of them nowadays. And being an associate trainer means I train them..........*face hitting desk multiple times* The past few months we had a complete idiot (we shall call her Ash.) that was constantly in your face and and second guessing what you are training her, and wouldn't listen at all. She was also a complete airhead. She burnt cookies and scones all the time so our store would smell horrible when she was working and she would make opening person stay their entire shift (which was not necessary because it would make you go over in hours and it would be too crowded behind the counter. On top of that, if opener stayed the entire shift that would mean that the store is losing more money than gaining that day.) so our general manager would put the opener as 5-12 so it got throw ash's idiocy that the opener should not be staying the entire time. Ash also loved to tell you that you're wrong, even though almost every single time you were right. And she always thought that if you were doing ten things at once, because hey you're a top notch worker, that you were going to have a mental meltdown... -_-lll Thankfully she got the hint that she wasn't meant to be a manager with that attitude and quit. (That may have sounded heartless, but seriously even the extrememly passive workers thought she was annoying and would find some reason not to come in or begged for others to work for them.) Now we're stuck with this jackA** that thinks he's God himself because he used to work at McAlister's.... But it's not only that, Favorites are being played and it feels as if you are in High School all over again with the pointless drama everybody stirs up. The general manager, yup you heard right, the GM, started spreading rumors about a romantic affair between a manager and associate because she was pissed at that associate for something so insignificant. No, I've had enough. The hilarious part of all this is that the other managers and the general manager are pissed that I told them Dec.31 is my last day. I will no longer work there and the pay isn't worth it. What's even more funny is that I told them I was leaving after I had been on my vacation and they were telling me that it was hell without me.... yup i'm a heartless *itch and I don't care. My co-workers all started complaining when I told them, and one of them slapped me on my side, one of the managers I get along well with threated to throw me in the freezer until I took it back. But enough is enough. and speaking of enough, I don't want to be around my family at all period. I love my grandparents and my brothers and my mom. I like catching up with my cousins occasionally and I like visiting my aunts and uncle. But i'll be damned if I am going to be listening anymore to nagging from my sister or dad any longer. Beacuse this chick is done being "not-good enough" and is done trying so hard to be "perfect" for everybody but herself. And I feel like the only way to truely not deal with that is to get out of the USA and be seperated by a big body of water. Start fresh and keep it that way. Because when I get to Ireland, I'm not going to hide being Bi, and I'm not going to hide who I am. However I have to, I am getting there, even if that means not attending school here and working like crazy and not taking vacations unless necessary and saving up to get there within the next year to five years. I just can't wait anymore. I am going to get more info on what I have to do to become a permant residence in Ireland from the Irish Embassy next year to start setting up a smooth transition. but in the meantime, I will be working and living in another town so that I can at least have the freedom to not be forced to babysit/ be mommy to my niece and my niece-on-the-way. ........yeah, I think that covers my venting- I mean update for the rest of 2015.... see yah in 2016!!