Platinum Shy-Bi Girl
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Ona last won the day on April 16 2017

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About Ona

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  1. Welcome! The more you browse on this site the more stories similar to yours you will find. Getting it out there is a good place to start. The next thing is that none of us can really know if this is all in your head or if she is “the real deal.” I know that you really want someone to tell you that and I joined this site with the exact same questions. But only you and her can figure that out. The real question to ask yourself (which I completely disregarded when the advice was given to me in the beginning) is what do you want to come out of this? What would that look like? How would that mess with your current life? Would you be able to handle that? my friend ended up not being the “real deal” but she was the catalyst that drove me to question what I want and what I need. And ultimately to what works best for me. Good luck on your quest. You are in for a ride!
  2. I think there are plenty of women here who’be made friends here and not necessarily looking for sex. I certainly joined just to get support with figuring out my feelings (and then all kinds of unexpected things happened). But it sounds like you are looking for a local friend. Maybe look around on an asexual site ? That’s a whole other spectrum and you are more likely to find people not looking for sex at all. sounds like what you want is someone to be romantic with but not sexual? Am I understanding it correctly? Would you want to kiss this person, hold hands? Or do you not want a romantic kind of thing AT ALL but literally just want a friend who happens to be bisexual and a woman?
  3. It’s pretty commonly used on this site. I think it goes along with many women on here figuring out (or admitting to themselves) that they are attracted to women later on in life. And yeah I guess it does regress you to feeling like a teenager all over again the first time that happens. what else would you call it? Obsession? Lusting over? Crush seems pretty accurate to me.
  4. I know exactly what you mean! I had a crazy crush on a friend about 13 years ago that had its grip on me for about 2 years and then blew up that relationship badly. I then met hubby, had a kid, got married with practically zero drama. Thought I had it all figured out. Ha! Until the new crush ented 3 years ago and it was like I learned nothing. I think that bothered me more than anything that happened between us. She was what finally had me searching for this site and joining. Being on here has been tremendously helpful. I figured so many things out about myself and am in such a better place now. Sending you good vibes and hoping you can sort it out too! Hopefully with less drama than I had ;)
  5. Find another woman to be in a relationship with. Should take your mind off her and make you care less what she does or says.
  6. My experience has been that I have NEVER had a crush where I made my feelings known and had them claim they return the feelings. Whether they actually returned them or just couldn’t say it is irrelevant. This is something that apparently happens to other people but has not been my experience. and these were not random people I saw and liked and didn’t know. These were usually my closest friends at that time. Friends that I spoke to daily and spent many hours in conversation or doing activities with.
  7. Oh I was just speaking in general. your situation sounds rough tho, because he wasn’t on board and then found out after the fact which I would think would be a lot harder to take than finding out before. And plus sounded like you had serious issues with him even before this... so my musings are probably not helpful to your case at all... sorry for derailing your thread i am actually quite lucky that I have a girlfiend on the side and the husband knows and is cool with it. I just didn’t realize how hard it is to be completely cool with that set up until I faced some configuration of that myself.
  8. Sure, but I wonder if a lot of women who wish their husband would be cool with it would actually be cool if their husband (or wife or boyfriend or girlfriend or whatever) would want to see someone else? Or if they have ever been in that situation.
  9. Honestly, the average woman probably wouldn’t do too well with her partner seeing someone else either. I think just in general non monogamy is still pretty taboo. A lot more so than bisexuality.
  10. I had this same conundrum about 2 years ago. I decided I would tell my friend how I feel first. Because there was no point in telling the husband when it was all up in the air. It turned out she at first seemed cool with my confession, but said she didn’t reciprocate my feelings. but shortly after she started acting strange towards me and when I called her out on it, she basically cut off all communication. i was devestated and told the husband. It turned out he knew all along. He was the one who comforted me and was super amazing about the whole thing. It was a great time to tell him (he knew I was bisexual in theory before) and I had all kinds of very candid conversations with him then. So when a woman came along who I truly loved and loved me back it was a much simpler conversation.
  11. Or she may think you are a creep and never want to speak to you again...
  12. Do you mean on shys? Or somewhere on the internet? Shys doesn’t have personals sections. It’s a forum where people participate and comment on each other’s topics. Might be helpful to check out the one called How our forum works? as it may make it clearer how this works. Welcome!
  13. Why isn’t it? I guess I don’t see a difference between preferring a certain color skin to certain color eyes or hair.
  14. What about people who have a thing for blue eyes? or tall people? or curly hair? Is that objectifying?
  15. Welcome! As you noticed there are a lot of women with similar stories to yours, So you will fit right in. It’s great that you feel your daughter would be accepting! its nice to have an ally.