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Platinum Shy-Bi Girl
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Cute&Curious last won the day on February 25 2017

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  1. Cute&Curious

    Searching for the "ideal"

    I've responded to topics on the 'ideal' several times since joining a couple of years ago, and I seriously doubt any of those responses were the same. The fact is, people change and grow, and our ideals change with experience. I've yet to find what I believe to be my ideal, like many married women, I thought I wanted just what you described above, a secondary relationship with a women while making my marriage my number one priority. Sounds wonderful doesn't it? Except I now know better, if I did manage to achieve this, would it really feel ideal? I highly doubt it. I'd still want more. What good are ideals if they don't line up perfectly with those involved? Ideals aren't always practical or realistic, maybe they aren't meant to be, maybe they're meant to simply guide us through our journeys, helping us understand our wants and needs. I no longer have an ideal, just a better understanding of who I am and what I'm capable of. If it feels right then that's ideal enough for me, but if it isn't enough for those involved, it isn't right for me. I don't need ideal, nor do I need to be ideal, but I do need to be enough.
  2. Hi, thanks for welcoming me!

  3. Cute&Curious

    hot & heavy messages

    I haven’t been around a lot lately so haven’t read ALL the posts but I have seen what’s been going on, so I’m gonna chime in here with my two cents and get right to the point... This argument isn’t really about erotic role play, no one here is knocking a little bit of fun with fantasy, many of us have engaged in it to some degree. The point is, and the only point that I BELIEVE @lsroses was intending to make, is that shybi is a support site, not a portal into the wonderful world of fantasy. This site has always been showcased as a community of women who like women supporting one another. Yes there is flirting here, and yes there are erotic stories here, and quite a bit of talk about sex and fantasy. BUT, the kind of erotic role play that has been going on over the last couple of weeks, in several threads, by various members is portraying a completely different view of shybi. We are giving the impression that this is a place where women should come to get their kink on and fulfill their fantasies. It’s taking away from the reputation that has been building for over a decade, which is, this is a support site, not a dating site, not a hookup site, not a place to get your sexual kicks. There are many platforms on the internet for those things, shybi is one of the only places, and I believe, the best for offering support. There are a couple of different outside groups that members here have created to sort of replace the chatroom and naughty forums that used to exist here but will not likely return. There are threads here talking about some of those spaces, as sort of a private extension of shybi if you’re interested in checking those out. This is not an attack on anyone, just a defence on the beloved nature of shybi
  4. Cute&Curious

    New girl on the block

    Welcome! There are lots of married bicurious women here to talk to. This is a very friendly and supportive place
  5. Cute&Curious

    Hi, new here

    Hi, and welcome! This is a really great place to talk through your feelings and your situation with women who understand. There are plenty of women here in similar situations so you aren’t alone, I’m sure you’ve already discovered that if you’d read through the forums. This is a supportive community filled with fantastic women from all over the world. Dive into the forums and comment on anything that interests you
  6. Cute&Curious

    Hi, married, bicurious, and struggling with self esteem

    Welcome! As mentioned, this is a great site, and has helped many women better understand their feelings and desires, and become more comfortable with their sexuality. I agree, it’s a great feeling when you find a community like this where you can both see and feel that you are definitely not alone, it gives you comfort somehow. Share your story when you’re ready
  7. Cute&Curious

    My youngest memory...

    Hi and welcome! This is a great place to work out your feelings and figure things out, and also make new friends in similar situations. Have a read through the section called How Our Forum Works to get an idea of what we’re about.
  8. Cute&Curious


    Hi and welcome! This is a fantastic place for support, have a look through the forums and you’ll realize you are far from alone. Women here come from different backgrounds, have different situations and are scattered all over the world...but one thing we all have in common is that we also happen to think that women can be amazingly beautiful and intriguing. It’s a great place to make new friends!
  9. Cute&Curious

    Hi! New and excited

    If you haven’t already, have a read through the section called How our Forum Works and then start your own thread in the Big Welcome Forum and introduce yourself
  10. Cute&Curious

    Making Long Distance Work

    I’m not sure you can, I think that’s just part of navigating a LDR. I’m inexperienced so my advice is probably useless, but here it is anyway... I’m sure leaving her will be hard...every time you do it. You can’t not be sad, or not miss her, but that doesn’t mean you can’t also be happy. Think about all the beautiful parts of your relationship and focus on that. Chances are, the only negative thing you can think of about your relationship is the distance that separates you. That doesn’t change the incredible bond that unites you. I’m sure there are countless things about your relationship that feels absolutely perfect. Think of how she makes you feel, not only when you’re together, but also when you’re apart. Think of how lucky you are to have such a beautiful connection. Remind yourself that leaving her is not the ending, you’re not losing her, she still loves you and you still love her, distance doesn’t change that. Start planning for your next visit, even if it’s far away, start talking about things you want to do/see together. Get excited about where your relationship is headed. Good luck, I hope you enjoy your time together!
  11. Cute&Curious

    Missing Her

    Can I ask why you and her are taking a break? I mean is the break meant to be temporary or permanent? Have you discussed future plans and expectations? If there’s no hope to resume your relationship, the only thing that can help ease the desire to be with her is time. The more contact you have, the harder it is to let go of that desire.
  12. Cute&Curious

    Narcissistic hubby! Can you relate?

    Be careful with thinking that way though. I do it too, I can’t help it, I’m a dreamer...but I also have a very practical side and think of things from every angle imaginable. Right now you’re sure that having a special girl in your life will make you happy, and I have no doubt that it will...at least at first. BUT that doesn’t mean it will make your marriage better, even if he were onboard. I mean for some it does, but for others it marks the beginning of the end. Female relationships tend to be more intense and more emotional, that combined with new relationship energy can quickly overshadow an established marriage that has lost its spark. Maybe your #2 slowly becomes your #1, jealousy sets in, balancing becomes difficult, etc. That’s why I said polyamory has to involve two (or more) partners that have a strong relationship to begin with, and are fully committed to making non-monogamy work. Again, I’m not trying to discourage you, believe me, I want exactly what you want...but we also have to recognize that getting what we want could destroy our marriage, and we might not get the happily ever after we were expecting. That’s why I personally can’t push the topic, because I’m not at the point where I can look him in the face and honestly say that non-monogamy absolutely will not jeopardize our marriage. If you look through the forums here you’ll find that for some women that’s exactly what happens. Just something to be mindful of.
  13. Cute&Curious

    New girl on the block

    Welcome! I’ve already responded to your other threads it seems, so won’t repeat myself. But as stated, you are definitely not alone, and this is a great place for support and advice
  14. Cute&Curious

    What is Your Ideal Situation?

    Am I right to assume that you’re already in a relationship with a woman (hidden from him), but you want to bring that relationship out in the open? As the others have said, poly arrangements aren’t for everyone, sure it sounds ideal, because it means you can have what you want...keep your marriage and also explore women...many of us want that. BUT poly relationships come with their own obstacles, and could very well cause my harm than good, in some situations. If he’s not accepting of your sexuality, which seems to be the case, he won’t likely be comfortable with you having female relationships anytime soon. If you tell him about her and he shuts it down demanding you end it, not only will both you and her get hurt, you’ll resent him for making that decision for you, AND, he’ll always be on guard and watch your every move from that point on. Now I’m not saying that you shouldn’t tell him, go ahead and cheat, only you can determine how best to proceed. Just because you want to tell him and you want him to accept it, doesn’t mean he will. Before you go there, think really hard about how you’ll feel about a bad outcome. You can’t force him to be poly, that kind of situation can only work if both partners are fully onboard and committed.
  15. Cute&Curious

    Narcissistic hubby! Can you relate?

    I can relate to your situation. My husband reacted poorly, he didn’t threaten to ‘out’ me, but he threatened to leave if I wanted to explore. It’s been over two years since I came out to him, and his position hasn’t changed much I’m afraid. He still has major insecurities, and while he says he accepts me, his actions speak otherwise. I never pushed the topic, but instead dropped it and pretended all is good, for his sake. He have an argument every so often where it’s brought up, only to make me realize that he’s never going to change his view. However not all men will have that same attitude. My advice is to keep communicating, if it’s something you feel you need to discuss, don’t shy away because it’s uncomfortable. You can’t make him accept this, the most you can do is let him know it’s important to you, and that his negative attitude hurts you. Be honest about how you feel, that’s one thing I was never brave enough to do. I hope you’re able to get through to him, acceptance is so important. Good luck!