Storm9

GoldenShyBiGirls
  • Content count

    127
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    United Kingdom

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112 Excellent

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About Storm9

  • Rank
    Big Tease
  • Birthday 01/01/1986

Profile Information

  • Music
    Most rock, acoustic, some pop, and Taylor Swift!
  • Location
    UK
  • Favourite TV Show
    Breaking bad, The Walking Dead, Game of Thrones, Impractical Jokers
  • Favourite Film
    The Labyrinth, Spirited Away, But I'm A Cheerleader, Borat

Recent Profile Visitors

969 profile views
  1. I love this video. I love the chemistry between Lyndsey and the dancer woman, it's hot!
  2. Thank you for all of your advice, I really do appreciate it. Deep down I know the best course of action, but I was starting to second guess myself to wether my feelings were justified, and if I need to admit defeat and approach her to try to make things normal again. But I'm not going to, not for now anyway. I need time to get over whatever this was if we're going to have any kind of chance at a friendship in the future. I feel like I'm back to square 1, and it is disheartening. Opportunities with women don't appear very often, especially when you're married and not actively looking for anyone. I wish I was as knowledgable and as level headed as you ladies.
  3. I don't plan on apologising to her because I don't know what I'd be apologising for! I'm not even sure I want an apology from her, all I want is for her to realise how she's made me feel, even if she doesn't care. We all have our own values and standards we apply to our friendships, and what we expect back in return. Maybe what me and her expect from friendships are completely different, I don't know. I know things will get better in time, it just seems a long way away at the moment.
  4. I use to think it meant more to her than just drunken fooling around, but my opinion of the situation has changed. Maybe she isn't 100% straight, but I don't think she is bisexual. I don't think it's anything to do with her being attracted to me, I think she craves attention and unfortunately she got the kind of attention she was looking for from me. I'm sure I could have been anyone. It makes me question what our friendship was based on, and if we had boundaries in place would she even be interested in a friendship with me. I think you're right in that she uses alcohol as a way to not be held accountable for her actions. Alcohol is great for lowering our inhibitions, but it doesn't put alien thoughts in our heads. It must be something she has thought about (and possibly wanted) while she's sober. I need to try to have some self respect and walk away.
  5. We're probably both responsible for ruining the friendship. What you say makes alot of sense, as always. I'm surprised with myself that I've held out not talking to her yet. I go backwards and forwards between thinking I'm making the right decision by distancing myself, and then maybe thinking everything would be better if we sit down and talk and sort things out. At the moment I feel as if she really doesn't care, as she hasn't approached me either, so maybe I am making the right decision. Time will tell.
  6. I know I don't post too much, but I spend alot of time reading the forums. I'm just after some advice from anyone regarding the situation I'm currently in. In summary, me and a co-worker, may I add a 'straight' co-worker with a boyfriend, ended up kissing around a year ago. This woke up alot of emotions in me that I haven't felt for a long time. The kiss etc was u expected and I didn't feel anything more for her, I wouldn't have even considered her a friend. The kissing happened after I told her I was bisexual, and we were both drunk. I never thought she would mean anything to me, but I did hope it would happen again cause it was hot. She told her bf about it straight away and he wasn't happy. Nothing happened for a few months, things felt a little weird for a bit but went back to normal quite quickly. Fast forward to a few months later, we again got drunk and she kissed me. We then fooled around quite a bit.... it felt amazing. She didn't tell her bf this time, but I felt like after the evening she went cold on me. Things were very awkward this time and we decided we have to stop getting drunk round each other. I was a bit more confused this time as I liked her more, and I didn't want it to stop between us. I tried to take a step back from her, and confided in a mutual friend about what had happened. This girl continued to try and get my attention and it was hard to ignore. I told her she needed to stop getting with me when she was drunk and she agreed. Nothing happened for a good 7 months, although during this time we've become close. We would speak every day, and in my opinion we would flirt. We were spending quite a bit of time together both inside and outside work. The more I got to know about her the more I liked her. We have so much fun together, and it always felt like we had this underlying sexual tension. The flirting continued and my feelings towards her grew. Due to a few conversations we had recently I had this feeling we both wanted something more to happen. A group of us went out and got drunk, and we ended up kissing. I told her I thought I liked her more than I should and she should know incase she wants this to stop. She told me it's just drunken excitement for her and she's sorry for leading me on, then proceeded to tell her boyfriend. I felt stupid and hurt, but I was at the point where I had to say something. I decided to take a break from her to try and sort my head out. I tried not speaking to her, not messaging her, but it was like she didn't want me to have space and kept messaging me and inviting me to do things etc. I told her I needed time. After about a week or so I spoke with her, and we both said how much we had missed each other and I instantly felt better, as I had really missed her in my life. I thought things would be okay and we could continue to be friends (although deep down I knew I still had a thing for her). Later that night she got drunk and messaged me saying how she couldn't stop thinking about me and how her head was messed up. She then invited me round for sex, and sent me some naked pics. I really really wanted to go round, but I stopped myself. She asked me a number of times but I declined. Instead we started sexting, and it was so hot. The next day she told me she had used me because she knows I like her. I felt awful. I couldn't believe she would hurt me like that on purpose, especially after what had happened the week before when I told her how I felt. I felt so sick, because I knew deep down she couldn't even value our friendship or my feelings to do that to me. I told her I didn't want anything more to do with her. Fast forward 2 weeks. I haven't said a word to her. I have to see her almost everyday and it's so horrible. I don't know what to do. Part of me feels like it must have meant something to her, surely? But the other part of me just feels like she's used me just for me attention. That is a hard thing for me to try and deal with. I've spoken to her boyfriend about it. She hadnt told him the truth about what had happened and had tried to manipulate the situation to make it seem like I've been chasing her and trying to put a wedge between them, which is completely wrong. He's also told me she doesn't seem to understand what the big deal is, and that she's waiting for me to apologise to her (?!). I want to sort things out but I don't know how. I don't know if I should try and speak to her, or if it's just going to make me angry. If I speak to her and she just doesn't care, I'll probably feel worse. Ideally I want to be able to see her and feel nothing for her, but I feel like that's a long way off. I wish I hadnt ruined our friendship :( I'm gutted.
  7. I really don't seem to have a 'type'. All the women I've either liked or been with have all been physically different. I am a bit of a sucker for dark eyes and dark hair though. I find the more of a connection I feel to someone, the more physically attractive I find them. I love it when you get on with a woman so well you start appreciating just how beautiful she is as herself, and you can't understand why others can't see it.
  8. It's almost a year ago since our first kiss, and the way I'm feeling now I WISH it had never happened. 

  9. I feel a sense of calm for the first time in a while

  10. At the moment I feel about 98% gay and 2% straight.
  11. God I'm going to miss her so much. How do women do this to us?

    1. Cute&Curious
    2. Beaulieu1

      Beaulieu1

      Ouchy...hurts doesnt it!.. x..

      Keep strong

  12. Honesty is definitely not the best policy 

    1. kairi

      kairi

      Being honest is not accepted well from others but the ones that love you demand that and they are the ones that count the most :)

    2. Cute&Curious

      Cute&Curious

      Not always....but a lot of the time it is. Give yourself some time before you conclude whether or not this is one of those times

  13. I'm sorry you think your crush might be experiencing internalized homophobia, I'm not sure there's alot you can do other than to keep being yourself and not let her hot and cold reactions around LGBT things, crushes on women etc effect you talking about them with her. If she is suffering from internalized homophobia, it might make her feel more comfortable around you, and maybe enough so that she starts letting her guard down around you. I can relate to alot of your post, as I've been in her position. I would actively avoid talking about anything to do anyone liking women, and I have been hot and cold with people as has your friend. I knew I was doing it but I didn't know how to change it or what to do with all the negative feelings around liking women. I'm alot better now, depending who I'm around, and what has helped me is talking to other women who like women and realising it's alot more normal and accepted than I first though. The feeling of knowing I'm not going to be judged helps massively, and allows me to feel like I can be myself. If you can make her feel that way it might help her feel more relaxed about her feelings, even if it's just when she's around you to start with. Maybe she can then start addressing the negativity she feels around her feelings. Ultimately it's going to have to be something she decides she wants to address but give her time. It seems she's tried to reach out to you from the things you've said, and she might not be able to control being cold with you at times, especially if she's experiencing fear about maybe telling you too much. I might be completely wrong, but I'm just talking from experience of how I can be. I wish you the best of luck.
  14. If anyone ever asked, I would never say I'm straight, however at times I'm quite happy for people to assume my sexuality based on my marriage to a man. There are some situations where I'm just not comfortable being out, such as to family or to certain friends/colleagues. I can count on one hand the amount of people I've come out to, I'm happier just letting people work it out for themselves. I am definitely more comfortable being more open about my sexuality with others who aren't straight? As I feel there's a certain type of understanding there already. I just wish I knew more bisexual people, as sometimes even with gay/lesbian people you can feel they're judging you for being bisexual. I have had someone quite recently make comments about how it's unfair how I'm married but also sometimes kiss girls, when she says she can't even find a girl, and why should I be able to have both. If only it was that simple! I think sometimes in life it can just be alot easier if people assume I'm straight, but then deep down if people don't know I'm bi I feel like they don't know the real me.
  15. Pretty much anything by Tegan and Sara. One of my fav slow ones is.........