Silver Shy-Bi Girl
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About Eyes_opened

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    Getting Flirty
  • Birthday 10/31/1982
  1. I'll join you! lol
  2. Really...he thinks you want to be "fuck buddies" when you just told him you didn't feel anything for him/are a lesbian? Does he not understand women at all?
  3. Wow...I just said that in a message today "divorce brings out the worst in people"....so true BiTriMama!!!! The fear of the unknown is overwhelming. Wanting to feel safe even if that means settling. But life is too short to settle, needing to step out onto the ledge for happiness is out there....must have the courage to reach for it!
  4. It is for the best however the children are the one's that don't quite understand it all. Yep nothing has to be determined right here and now. It will be awkward for the first couple weeks as lot of emotions will come out (like grieving of a loved one's death). Space and time is needed and open communication. It's hard for him because I imagine he still wants to have sex with you and you no longer desire his touch. Speaking from personal experience.
  5. It will be painfully difficult but you will feel the weight lifted off your shoulders. My husband cried when I wrote him the letter but just be as transparent with your feelings as best you can. It's not good to live your life in a lie. I'm still in the transition phase and wonder if I"m doing the right thing but I've been given signs that I am. The hardest things in life often lead to the most rewarding outcomes, just the getting there is the challenging part. This week is super busy for me but if you want to send me a p.m. and I can respond to you if you have any questions that I can help with.
  6. If you get a chance go under the header for Marriage section and read my post of "Finally did it, ripping the band-aid off* (or something like that
  7. Wow! I can so relate to you in pretty much all levels.....I won't write a book here but hopefully it's okay to P.M. you? Long story short (for other readers). I had my first sexual experience with a woman last November and is was on a whole new playing field!!! Sex with my husband lost it's meaning because I discovered with a woman that's what sex was to feel like. The emotional connection with the sexual/physical connection makes for fireworks that I never experienced with any man. I struggled being attracted to him nor any guy (as we were in an open marriage when I came out to him as bi August of last year). I find it difficult to put into words what I feel and I've been told I express myself very well when it comes to written stories (like you are there - posted a few things here on this site). You have to know what is best for you. I clung onto the fact that I needed to stick around for my children but I because more miserable and he got more frustrated. We tried counseling but it was him to initiated the divorce as he wouldn't want to be in a sexless marriage - I came out last month to him as lesbian (as a counseling session) and he said "it's over.' After that we considered a triad but that was holding out hopes and didn't want to string him along. I couldn't bring myself to have sex with him anymore. It hurt. I physically pulled away when he tried to kiss me during sex. My body didn't want his touch....the inner struggle was/is still real. Anyways I'll stop at that and if you want we can chat personal messenger.
  8. Yes having boundaries are a must as I can see it getting messy when feelings are so strong and wanting more of each other.
  9. Is it me or who out there could just sit under a night's sky and gaze with deep thoughts for hours or simple think nothing at all and just "be". Yearning so much from life yet so much "stuff" tend to cloud our minds and consume our time with minuscule matters.
  10. Love this poem! Very expressive and elegant......nailed it of what the feelings I am currently going through with coming out lesbian and the hubby wanting a divorce. Me personally wanting to stay, for the kids and "comfort zone" but also knowing what possibilities await in the next chapter that I'm forced to take.
  11. Well depends on your age requirements, lol. My dad is 64 ,(I'm 34 so I wasn't exactly "young" when I came out but not in my 50's like some - doesn't matter what age anyways so as long as someone is true to themselves). He didn't think much of it, my step-mom was surprised. Now my aunts (who are like 2nd moms to me since my mom died when I was 19) they were not supportive/against the notion to have those feelings were sinful.
  12. You don't know how much that made me smile....You have been on my mind, hoping it would work out for you two.....AND IT DID!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So happy for you. No greater feeling in the world then to hold each other when the pull is that strong, A loved that couldn't and wouldn't be DENIED!!! <3 <3 <3
  13. I think for me the pressure that society puts on woman not to mention religious upbringing prevent a lot of more women to be allow themselves to be truly free. "You have to have a man to be happy." I don't remember how many times I was told that growing up. also this: "you meet a man, you marry him, you have children together and remain married till death do you part"...honestly if I realized who I was since age 8 I wouldn't have ever married a man. Religion did one hell of a trickery in conforming minds. Sorry I know this is a tangent but religion seems to divide while spirituality unites. I'm glad I can still me a active member of this site This forum give such good support and knowledge and it feels good to be able to give back!
  14. I'm curious as to how many women out there that 1st came out as bi-sexual only later to come out for the 2nd time as lesbian? Is this common? Is it just a matter of self-acceptance due to either society or religious conformity? I fall into this category as I came out August last year as bi, then last month as lesbian. Is it still okay to be part of this forum?