ali32

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About ali32

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  1. @blueberry...this is very insightful and very helpful. I can honestly answer yes to whether my commitment is to my husband...I cannot imagine a life without him in it. But this deep seeded need to explore with women interferes with my ability to give him what he needs sometimes, it's like the thoughts are so consuming that I have nothing left to give him in the bedroom. Don't know if that resonates with you or anyone else but that is the best way I can explain it. The 70/30 explanation makes a lot of sense to me. The hetero in me is 100% his, in terms of men he is all I want and need. What I am missing is something he absolutely just cannot provide...ya know what I mean? Lol...
  2. Hi all. It has been quite a while since I posted here...I needed to tell my husband about my being bi before feeling right about talking to other people about it. I recently took that plunge. He was shocked, but after reassuring him that I am still committed to our marriage and family he warmed up to the idea. Now I have a new hurdle...how to break the news that this is a part of myself that I have not explored and would very much like to, while still being totally committed to him. I know there are lots of you ladies making this type of arrangement work, how did you ask your husbands for that freedom? How did they respond? Is it fair to expect him to NOT be with other women if he grants me the opportunity to explore? So many questions....thanks in advance.
  3. @BiTriMamathank you, that is very good and very welcomed advice. I am not open to exploring with him involved because I know it would lead to ill feelings, so that is going to be a hard talk for sure. I have not told anybody in my life about this...this site is the first step I have taken to put any of this out into the real world instead of all in my head. I might get to a point where I confide in someone, but I'm one who has always kept friends at an arm's length so I'm doubtful I'll ever feel up to it. Thanks again for your reply!
  4. @Krissia Hello and welcome, I am a newbie to all this "saying it out loud" stuff too. I am grateful for this site and the women like us willing to share their stories and advice. I haven't taken the step of talking to my husband about this yet...looking for the right moment and trying to make sure he knows he is my number 1 everything. Thanks for sharing!
  5. @LLIYL thanks for sharing. Isn't that just a bitch...the timing was totally off for you and hubby. Hopefully you two can come to an agreement that suits you both.
  6. @noobi I don't think you were an asshole. I think you needed to let it out and those were the circumstances that made you brave enough to so it. Kudos. I'm with you 100% though. My husband is my number 1 and I would not want to jeapordize what we have. But I would like to open up to him. And hopefully he will have an open mind...
  7. @Curious-bi-dreamer it is definitely refreshing to see a site like this that allows those of us in the "discovery" phase to have a sounding board. It feels like a huge weight has been lifted already just saying these things "out loud" here.
  8. @noobi Thank you for sharing. I waiting for the right time to share this part of me with my husband - we are moving into a new house next week and he starts a new job the week after that, so I don't want to add another stressor right this moment. How did you approach the topic with your mister? How did he take it at first?
  9. Hello out there. I have never talked about any of this outside of my own head. I am happily married to an amazing man and have one wonderful daughter with him. I have known for some time...possibly forever that I am 100% attracted to women as well. Usually I can put these thoughts and feelings away, but they always come back and always get stronger. It has come to a point where I am not enjoying intimacy in my marriage because my mind is so busy elsewhere. I'm sure my husband notices... Browsing these forums has been helpful, just seeing there are so many others in my situation is helpful. I'm really just looking for an outlet and like minded women to talk to. My biggest hope is to gain insight on how to talk to my husband about all of this, especially if my goal is to maybe explore some of these desires. So hello, that is my story in a nutshell