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About ThatsNoMoon

  • Rank
    French Kisser

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  • Music
    Alt rock mostly, but pretty eclectic
  • Location
    UK, North West

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  1. Hmmm interesting... this is going to be literally around the corner from me
  2. Back after a rather long absence.... 

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. ThatsNoMoon


      :lol: just trying to get my shit together really. Failed of course lol 

    3. Apsalar15


      Don't we all lol

    4. Nidalaeh


      I'm still trying to get mine together. Good luck!!

  3. @Louise I think you've made the right choice there in stepping off the rollercoaster. I don't know enough about your situation to presume her reasons for acting this way, but whether it's anxiety, guilt or a jealous/suspicious spouse (after all, it sounds like this is essentially an affair for you both, unless your other halves know) or a personality trait of hers... it doesn't really matter why when the unchanging result is that you feel miserable and toyed with. That isn't healthy, it's a toxic relationship. I've had similar unhealthy relationships in the past - I think in all honesty I'm eager to please and a tad easy to infatuation, especially when I was young, and a couple of women over the years saw me coming a mile off and took me for a ride. Eventually it was about drawing a line on what I would accept from people's behaviour, and feeling confident and happy enough in myself and my self-worth to really enforce that line when people crossed it. I guess another thing to think about would be "what would a 'good' outcome look like here?" - if you are both married, and presuming your spouses don't know about the relationship, what is a realistic end-game for this? I'm making no sort of moral judgement at all here on your relationship - as I say, I don't know your situation. However, have you thought about where you would *actually* want or expect this to go? If it's an extra-marital thing, whether known or unknown to the other spouses, then there would have to be either firm boundaries or a marriage exit strategy in place for it to work. Do you want to be with her full-time? Do you want to stay with your spouse? Then... critically... does she want the same thing? Is it realistic? Is the outcome worth the effort of tolerating this behaviour from her? If not, then ending it may will save you a world more heartache down the line
  4. shybi

    ^^ Seconded! I've been kicking around on forums (and at times running them) since the late 90s, and "word association" etc topics have always existed as a "post count pump and dump" for people, but when it's the majority of your active content, then it's a bad sign. The next highest traffic topics here seem to me to be the sexual conversations. Whilst I'm not averse to that myself, it could put some people off and it doesn't bode well for serious topics. Perhaps there just isn't the volume of active membership to sustain 'proper' discussions? Everyone has their own interests, and when you don't have enough people, you won't get the numbers needed to generate interesting conversations on a range of different topics as not enough people find it relevant to them. This is something that could be addressed with an appropriate comms and engagement plan - targeted posts on social media, getting a couple of influencers on board, reaching out to LGBT organisations/charities etc etc There are things that can be done, but it won't be a quick and easy fix. I've not been around long, but I'd be gutted if this place was no more.
  5. Congrats! It's awesome when you finally meet some who just 'gets' you like that
  6. Just be honest with him - tell him you gave it a go, and realised that there wasn't a romantic spark there. I think sometimes we can be a little too over-cautious about "letting them down gently" to the point where we're ambiguous about it as not to hurt someone's feelings. This is especially the case for women towards men, as we're pretty much conditioned into it socially. However, feelings get hurt, and this is life. You can be respectful and gentle, whilst still being quite clear and firm about the fact that you don't see a romantic future for the two of you. For example if you said to him "I don't want a man in my life at this time" it leaves the door open - 'well what about a later time?' - when really what you mean is "I don't want you in a romantic sense". Close the door nicely, by all means, but to avoid this recurring you do need to let him know that it's definitely closed.
  7. "Maybe she's born with it.... maybe it's Sertraline!" 

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Hungry


      It's wrong that I just laughted isn't it :P

    3. ThatsNoMoon


      Haha well let's just say I wasn't 'born with it'! 

    4. Hungry


      It's interesting the UK tend to refer to it as that now, I always knew it a Zoloft :P It wasn't mine btw although I wasn't born with it either so could of probably done with some myself lol.

  8. Internal - probably problem solving abilities. It's certainly my most useful trait! External - my tattoos. Pretty much the only element of external bodily appearance that I've had full control over
  9. TV and film-wise, my heart has belonged to Gillian Anderson since I was about 10 years old!! In more recent times... basically half the cast of Battlestar Galactica (the modern remake is quite possibly the single greatest TV show ever made!)... but especially Katee Sackhoff - AKA Kara 'Starbuck' Thrace *sigh*
  10. Hey and welcome I was a lurker for a while before finally posting myself, and it's great to finally dive into the discussion
  11. I'm not a lover of it. Had an ex that was obsessed with attempting it... so me being very curious what on earth it was did a quick review of the medical literature (as I was pretty certain that women didn't have the physiological capacity to produce and store large quantities of any such sexual fluid) and all of the scientific research carried out on it at that point and since has found that although women do produce small amounts of what might be called ejaculate, when they "gush" it's actually just mostly urine, from the bladder, with minimal skene gland secretions found in a handful of cases. So I've just found that way too off putting. So yeah, being *too* curious about it kinda killed that one off for me. I totally get that some people are into watersports, but not me. If anyone's interested, here's a recent paper : Salmana, S. et al. (2015) 'Nature and origin of “squirting” in female sexuality'. J Sex Med 2015;12:661–666.
  12. Hey and welcome
  13. Hello and welcome
  14. Ooooh, I'd best summarise my sexuality in this respect as "a total f*****g mess", however I can say I'm definitely not just in it for the sex. I'd love it to be that bloody simple! haha I've dated far more many women than men, and started doing so from a young age (about 14 for my first girlfriend). Whilst I've been in love with, and had long term relationships with, a couple of women (even living together with one) which just didn't work out in the end, in terms of men the only one I've ever actually fell in love with is my husband. But... I find I enjoy good sex with a man more enjoyable than good sex with a woman (can't stress enough the word 'good' here, I'm definitely not talking about all sex with men/women lol). Desire for that was what largely killed off my relationship with the ex GFs in all honesty. Maybe I haven't really had a "good" woman though, and maybe in the past I just met really shitty guys.... you never know! So yeah, that's been my curse I guess, when with a guy I do miss the closeness and softness emotionally of a woman (and I'll be honest, the sex too - the good sex anyway), but it's never worked in the end with a woman for me because I always miss the physicality of men more. Missing men is a relationship killer for me, but missing women is a relatively minor frustration.
  15. I tend to use WhatsApp to have more 'flowing' and natural conversations with a few I've met on here after a few PM back and forths but chat rooms for me tend not to work due to time differences or just me not being able to sit at the computer for ages. I find mobile means much easier and more intuitive now