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RaleighAnne

Members
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    13
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    United States

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About RaleighAnne

  • Rank
    Bashful
  • Birthday 12/13/1992

Profile Information

  • Music
    Caissie Levy's 'Monster'
  • Location
    New England
  • Signature Fragrance
    Vanilla Lace
  • Favourite Book
    Fried Green Tomatoes
  • Favourite TV Show
    Grace & Frankie
  • Favourite Film
    Fried Green Tomatoes

Recent Profile Visitors

572 profile views
  1. I relate to this, because this is my natural approach. In my head it gives my friends and family the understanding that I'm bi with out actually having to bring myself to use the terminology yet
  2. I guess we need to start wearing T-shirts that say, 'Open to being hit on by both women & men, but preferably women'
  3. I feel most people assume I'm straight. I have feminine qualities by traditional standards and I've gone to places with the intention of meeting other women with bi/gay interest, but I usually am left alone or unregarded.
  4. Today my therapist and I discussed my orientation. This is the third time it has come up in counseling. She's usually pretty quick to dismiss my bisexual/bicurious thoughts because of my lack of experience. Today I think she knew something was different because she started going through oddly specific questions. I had to lie through my teeth when she opens her mouth and asks, 'do you have fantasies about women in your own life?'

    I'm pretty sure it breaks the code to respond with something like, 'ya, you... and all the time'. 

    I couldn't make eye contact and I felt a fire on my face like never before. 

    Maybe time for a new therapist... *head slap*

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. RaleighAnne

      RaleighAnne

      @moonbynight You know, I've been having the same thought...

    3. RaleighAnne

      RaleighAnne

      @BenedettaC Oh, I know it's common.. I've just never had such an attractive therapist before. Might pose a problem if I don't start filtering my thoughts....

    4. BenedettaC

      BenedettaC

      Hmm... A relationship (professional though it may be) with an attractive, seemingly caring woman with whom you've developed a certain level of 'intimacy' can definitely lead to fantasies... But, of course, depending on the type and frequency of those, your sessions could become progressively more uncomfortable, so yes, it's probably a good idea to filter your thoughts a bit. Also, as @moonbynight said, the fact that your therapist is dismissing your bisexual/bicurious thoughts because of your lack of experience is rather suspect...

  5. RaleighAnne

    Which one would you choose?

    Blue- for sure! I might even try harder in high school the second time around.... also before I take the pill someone remind me to write down some lottery numbers
  6. RaleighAnne

    Bi & Struggling

    I wonder if I suffer from the, 'but he could be the guy for me' syndrome. Meaning, in most ways I am happy; good friend, good partner, good life... but I imagine I would feel more satisfied and less concerned if all of that was 100% true. I'm getting better at being honest with myself- it's being honest with other people that has me with my tail between my legs.
  7. RaleighAnne

    Bi & Struggling

    I'd kind of seen this in the past. Especially online...lots of hiding and secrecy. I don't believe it's fair to my boyfriend or myself to be this muddled so I can't for see dragging someone else into the mess just to get some clarity for myself. I'm trying to lighten the situation, not spin it up. Truthfully, and I wonder if this is the same for a lot of other people on here, I think my biggest issues lie in having my higher needs met. The ones that say, 'Married with kids. That's what you want'. And of course it's much easier delivered from my current stationary position. I've got that all accessible at arms reach. And he's a good guy so... BUT How much of that is really lying to myself overall? If I'm thinking about it THIS much... hmm.. perhaps I have learned suppressiveness. I'm not sure. It's like I taught myself to be complicit.
  8. I just have to say Fried Green Tomatoes is freakin epic. I haven't watched it in so long. It's definitely time to give it another go. 

    1. RaleighAnne

      RaleighAnne

      I have Towanda tattooed on my arm. My obsession runs a little deep...haha I don't think I've gone more than 30 days without watching it since I was 10. I highly suggest the book as well, if you have not read it yet. It's very different from the film, but nice to see what it was based after. They touch on the accepted-ness (or toleration) of Ruth and Idgie's relationship a bit more. Truthfully I didn't even know that they were in a relationship until I read the book. That went over my head as a kid haha. 

    2. moonbynight

      moonbynight

      I saw it when I was 10 too, and 10 year old me identified with Idgie (I wasn't quite as much a tomboy, but enough to relate) and loved Ruth, but I had no idea they were more than friends. Years later, I found out it was considered a lesbian story, and it all kinda made sense.

    3. RaleighAnne

      RaleighAnne

      From 10-16 I loved Ruth. But when I got older I fell in love with Idgie. I love her clothes, her personality, everything. Gah! 

      I think the movie did maybe too good of a job convincing people it wasn't a lesbian story, just to appease Hollywood. Makes me wonder if it was redone today if it would be the same, or different. 

  9. RaleighAnne

    Bi & Struggling

    Exactly this! I get that nervous feeling like I’ve judged myself too quickly or I never gave myself the respect I deserved. Heres to working things out!
  10. RaleighAnne

    Hawaii? Bueller? Bueller?

    I just happened upon this post, but ironically I'm taking a two week trip out to Hawaii at the end of this summer to meet up with a friend of mine who moved out there! It'll be my second time visiting Oahu. I'm so excited! It was my dream to teach there after grad school. Maybe some day!
  11. Reached 100 pages on my novel today- finally some progress. I know the saying goes, 'practice makes perfect', but in my case I'd like to hope that practice makes me JK Rowling. 

    1. Nidalaeh

      Nidalaeh

      Grats!! And good luck

    2. RaleighAnne

      RaleighAnne

      @NidalaehThank you, much appreciated!

    3. JadeBleu15

      JadeBleu15

      @RaleighAnne Excellent, be complete before you know it. 

  12. RaleighAnne

    Beautiful breasts

    I feel like I very much so related to this post. I imagine it's this idea that helped me happen upon this site in the first place; just that overwhelming desire to be with a woman. To touch, to play...to stop writing about women together and start acting on my desires. Oh well, baby steps for now.
  13. RaleighAnne

    Bi & Struggling

    That's definitely my biggest concern. 'Rocking the boat'. There's that sense of guilt that is super difficult for me to over come and that's what I'm working on dealing with. I think part of my complications is that I got comfortable and I know that this will end up being an extremely uncomfortable situation. I'm also not sure if I'm just looking to experiment or have a relationship. I don't want to get in the mind set that I'll back burner a woman just so I can make a decision about what I want at home, if that makes sense. I could see myself being the kind of person that just stays in a 'safe' relationship because it's convenient and available and doesn't have any of those 'fears' associated with it like coming out as bisexual to my friends and family does. But I guess that's why I am here. To educate myself a little better on who I really am as a person and embrace the wider view that I have that I've been suppressing.
  14. RaleighAnne

    Bi & Struggling

    He knows that I have bisexual ideas/preferences, but I've never gone as far as to tell him I am bisexual. I talk about it in another forum, but as an adolescent I definitely leaned 80:20, with women in favor (I actually 100% still do). When I started getting teased around middle school, I started putting up this facade that I was entirely straight. I did it for so long that by college I only dated men off dating sites because I was too afraid to set my orientation to bi, for fear someone I knew would see it. And I only dated them once to create the illusion that I preferred men, but was just picky. I'm not sure how I ended up in the relationship I did, but I got comfortable. For a while all of my muddled thoughts seemed to drift away in the distraction of a first real romance. But as I grew comfortable, I also got kinda stuck. We started planning, and moving, and I sheepishly started agreeing with everything that was happening, trying to ignore that 80:20 about me. But now I'm worried I'm going to bring him down with me while I'm in denial about what I probably really do want. I feel like I've created this obligation to stay with him because of all of those promises for a future we made each other. I know, I know... it's worse to stay and lead him on so to speak; I think that's why I came here. Just to talk things out with other women.
  15. I have liked women all my life. I think it all started with Sarah Michelle Geller. I used to have hundreds of posters of her around my room. And the from there it morphed from celebrity, to singer and so forth. Always women. When I started to get teased, I started adding photos of men to my wall. I never dated, women or men... but I would go on dates with men (one time) just to get people to stop asking. I used to talk to a lot of women, but everyone shied away from the fact that I was inexperienced and closeted. To this day I'm not really out. I'm open about my attraction to women, but not the extent of it. I'm dating a man, but I find I'm more attracted to other women. I just suppressed it.
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