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GracefulGyrl

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    14
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About GracefulGyrl

  • Rank
    Bashful
  • Birthday 02/18/1985

Profile Information

  • Music
    Have been revisiting Whitney Houston ballads lately! Nothing like those Bodyguard songs!
  • Interests
    Gardening, fishing, hiking, camping, budgeting and wealth building
  • Signature Fragrance
    D&G Light Blue
  • Favourite Book
    Cane River by Lalita Tademy, The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey
  • Favourite TV Show
    Homeland, Succession, Insecure
  • Favourite Film
    Coming to America, Beauty and the Beast

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  1. GracefulGyrl

    North Carolina

    Charlotte area!
  2. You all have to watch this movie called “Concussion”. It’s on Netflix.... it totally embodies this topic. It’s about a stay home mom in a suburban area deciding to be an escort for some excitement. She started by hiring one and realized how sleazy it can be. She decided to be different. You see Her encounters with different women.... one who ends up being a married neighbor from her spin class. Others were women just like us. It’s very interesting...
  3. I agree with most of you. If the chemistry isn’t there, it won’t be memorable and you’ll walk away like WTF did I just do.... I’ve hooked up a few times with chicks that I didn’t have any kind of true chemistry, relationship or friendship with. You build up to the excitement of finally making it happen, but then it’s weird.... it could be that my hookups were with other women who were more on the curious side, so I must say I felt like I was doing most of the work. It should be a mutual longing on both sides. I haven’t slept with other men after I got married, but I feel that it’s the same for guys too. The best sex has always been with men that I loved or kind of loved lol.... I think because you are more likely to feel comfortable and sexy. If you’re not completely comfortable, it won’t be as enjoyable. That’s just my opinion!
  4. GracefulGyrl

    Captain Marvel's Sexuality

    I’m glad I wasn’t the only one wondering. I definitely felt a family vibe and was waiting for that to potentially be disclosed towards the end. They just left it as weirdly platonic....I also felt like Rambeau was giving her a lot of piercing stares.... as a woman inching towards the right hand side of the Kinsey scale.... I was feeling some les vibes in most of their scenes. I think it would be safe to let them at least kiss in a scene. Given that Marvel has a lot of male fans, I don’t see any of those guys being too offended by a little lesbian action ;-) I think that would be safer and more well received by the base than male/male. I’m just thinking of the male hardcore marvel fans that live in my house.
  5. I got hit on by a chick at the farmers market with my kids. My youngest was in the baby carrier on my chest, like 6 months. He had on a Boston Red Sox hat. Her line was “hey little slugger”, “he’s soooo cute”! Then she started asking about where I was from, like from Boston. Conversation ultimately led to me having to tell her I was married. Smh.... I’m not sure if I would have had the same response if I was attracted to her lol *just sayin**
  6. My story is pretty similar regarding my husband trying to put pieces together. Every now and then, I feel like he is testing me, trying to trip me up. He’s asked on multiple occasions how many women I’ve been with to see if I answer differently. My biggest regret was telling him too late. I should have told him when we were dating, before we got married. I did not tell him that I had been in a 3 yr relationship with a female about 6 years prior, nor that I had dated two others when I was in college. I met him at a stage in my life when I was exclusively dating guys and a single mom. I didn’t feel that it was necessary to divulge that early on. We lived together when we were engaged and he found some pictures with my 3 yr ex on my external hard drive. He needed to use it and I forgot that I had saved some pictures. Nothing freaky, but we just looked super cozy and coupled up in all the pictures. He threatened to call off the wedding and I cried and cried. I told him that we were just best friends.... but that she was lesbian. We were best friends, which was honest. He knew she was my best friend in the current but did not know we had been in a relationship. She lived far away so it wasn’t like we hung out. Fast forward to about a year into our marriage and I felt compelled to come somewhat clean. I told him that I was just experimenting and that it was less than a year... another lie. Over time the lies about my past have built up. I wish that I had just come clean about it all when we were dating, then I could have set the tone for how these issues were to be approached in our marriage. Or, maybe we would not have gotten married at all. I know people who have supportive spouses, but the difference was that they knew during dating. At this point my husband basically knows I’m bi, but anything outside of a threesome would be out of the question. He told me that he wished I had told him about myself when we were dating because he would have tried to have a threesome sooner! My sister is bi and dating a female and my dad is a bi man on the down low (only to him, everyone knows). So my husband is not surprised. He just wants to believe that all of that is behind me. Unfortunately, it’s not. I tell my little sister these lessons all the time. You’re always better off telling the guy early so that he can make his own decision. If he sticks around, he’s probably going to be open minded enough to let you explore during the relationship. It’s too late for me.
  7. GracefulGyrl

    Married & would like a girlfriend

    I feel like 90 percent of the married women on here probably want the same thing to some extent. Before I got married, I did have a few relationships with women and equal amount with men. After I got married I thought I was done and over thinking about women. It wasn’t until about 4 to 5 years in at age 34, that the feelings have started coming back. My husband knows about one of my relationships but would freak out if he knew how many. He was furious about what he did know and it took him a while to get over it.... almost called off our wedding. He’s definitely not open minded enough for a poly. He wants a threesome, but I don’t. I tell him he doesn’t want that, he may be surprised how good I am and won’t like it. I joke about it but I’m serious. I don’t want to end my marriage or anything, I just want a good friend that I can have some fun with from time to time. Preferably, also married with kids. I wish I could meet that person organically, but that’s wishful thinking. Back when there was craigslist personals, it was crazy to see how many women were in the same boat. However, it’s super scary. I’ve interracted with some women that I met that way, but never found a good match. I met someone that would be awesome, but she tends to get cold feet. Every time we are going to meet, something comes up. So Im over it. I feel horrible about wanting to act on these desires. I don’t want to sneak around, but I have no choice. I will always feel like something is missing. I watch a lot of porn but after a while, it’s all the same.... same faces, same shit. Same chicks getting gangbanged by dudes and then acting like they are in a lesbian relationship in another video. It’s just not real. I’m sure we are all going through the same shit!
  8. GracefulGyrl

    Autism Spectrum Disorder

    @CallistoDidNotWin I’m so happy to have come across your post, on here of all places lol! I think it’s interesting that a lot of us are starting to become more self aware in adulthood, especially with the surge of autism awareness in the last decade or so. In seeing more examples (albeit extreme) on TV and Vloggers sharing their experiences, we are starting to piece the puzzle together a bit and things start finally making sense. I’m the butt of jokes in my house of being a self-diagnosed person the spectrum. Like you, I think it might be Aspergers. Like you, and most females it seems, I’m very high functioning at work for example and in low touch interactions/acquaintances. However I feel that I’m low functioning when it comes to establishing and retaining friendships. I’ve become more self aware of it lately. I’m a bit weird and don’t really have a filter. I say a lot if things that I end up regretting after the moment has passed or is too late to rectify. I tend to repeat things and not even realize it in conversations. Sometimes I just say weird shit. I struggle with empathy. It’s starting to finally impact me at work with email interactions. I work in corporate America and deal with a lot of external customers. Apparently I tend to offend people on email and when I reread it, I don’t understand, but then I’m told it’s how I said it. This has never been an issue brought to my attention in 11 years until sensitive individuals have started tattling on me to a relationship manager. It’s definitely scaring me about how I view my career because now thee are things I want to avoid that were not issues before. I’m also finding that I go hard on certain things at a given time. Like one moment I’m obsessed with on topic for about a month and the next I’m obsessed with something else. I only find solitude and joy in individual, quiet activities like fishing and gardening. I can go on and on, but I’m debating if it’s worth a diagnosis. I’ve given up on maintaining or establishing friendships. I’m just focused on my family and the people who know me, accept me, and love me unconditionally. Secretly, I wish I had a group of girlfriends, but I’m sure I’d just say the wrong thing and alienate myself or vice versa. I’d feel bad going to a support group without a diagnosis.
  9. GracefulGyrl

    New to this. Anyone in my area?

    Hey! I’m in the Charlotte area
  10. GracefulGyrl

    Weekend Getaways

    Try Provincetown, MA. It’s basically a LGBTQ utopia. It’s a place, like Fire Island, NY, where mostly gay men go to vacation in the summer. However, I went on accident, had no idea of the population, with a boyfriend, and was totally awestruck. I saw a lot of female couples. I think it’s a great place to get away to if you are on the low and want to live out a lesbian fantasy. You can hold hands etc with high likelihood that you won’t run into anyone you know. It’s a beach town with good food, good shopping, bars, drag shows, etc.
  11. GracefulGyrl

    Married women?

    I’m curious as to how you met her, the story behind that..... given that you were not looking. In love stories of fate.
  12. I’ve done so in a way on a couple of occasions, by way of happy ending massage. However, my stories on both occasions s were not a success. The first time, the girl was cute, but it was clear that it was just a job for her to get extra cash. She was not into it at all and I left feeling like it was a total waste of money. The second time the chick looked nothing like her pictures anymore. She was totally unattractive. She advertised as happy ending but was more of a hooker in my opinion. She basically didn’t massage me and just started going down and kissing all over me with a vengeance. She even brought weed to make me more comfortable. She was clearly into it. However, I was not attracted at all and could not come. I also felt like that was a waste of money. So I’m out $500 between those two occasions. I’d never do that again.
  13. I think this is the million dollar question. If it were that easy to detect, you wouldn’t see so many women on dating sites looking for “unicorns”, FWBs, threesomes, “friends” etc. I have this really cute neighbor mom friend who I thought/think was bi. She has always been a bit too touchy feely in my opinion. Granted, that’s usually when drinks are involved. Also, she’s always commenting on my social media pics like “beautiful! Gorgeous! OMG! Etc”. One night when we went on a mom’s night out, I tried to see if she would take the bait by telling her that I had history with women. However she was just wow, I would have never guessed it. I’m talking to her more, I’ve learned that she is a total prude, and is just super nice. She is a good example of the hard to detect and mixed signals out there. I also have a very feminine coworker that I’m not sure about. She apparently has been to a lot of strip clubs and knows a lot about them for her age. Makes me wonder if women use conversation to send cues. Like, should I be picking up on that? She is always trying to hug at work. I’ve thought about asking her, I think I could get away with it, but don’t want things to get weird. People assume I’m straight, I think.... although I have been approached by out lesbians at places like the farmers market when I’m with my kids. Maybe they think I’m divorced or the nanny. I’ve never been approached or received a signal from another bi woman that I’m aware of. My husband thinks I’m just a starer in general, so it’s possible that I’m out here giving vibes. It’s unfortunate that despite all that, I’ve never organically met another bi woman... as I’m sure we all would prefer.
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