Platinum Shy-Bi Girl
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moonbynight last won the day on May 15

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About moonbynight

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  1. I'm the same way. I really don't do physical affection at all except in the context of a romantic interest or a small child who came out of my body. I will fake it if the situation calls for it (eg. a friendly hug), but I'm not comfortable with it. I was going to write that I find this confusing, but really, I'm not sure that's true. I think I'm actually pretty good at telling whether something is intended as friendly vs. more-than-friendly. I just have a hard time trusting my instincts when I think it might be more than friendly.
  2. We have a brother site but it seems to be down right now. Most of the LGBT subreddits that aren't women-specific lean heavily towards men. The big ones all have links in their info to more special-interest ones. Some big ones are: I don't know about any of the male specific some because surprisingly I don't have any interest in them
  3. For me, my gut is usually right about the heart of the matter, but it doesn't see the bigger picture. So I might be right that someone is attracted to me, but they're in a monogamous relationship or not accepting of their same-sex attraction or some other factor that means it's never going to go anywhere. This can sometimes get confusing.
  4. I'm much more into the idea of being dominant with a woman than a man, but think I'd prefer switching. I suspect being one or the other all the time would get old.
  5. I wasn't trying to say it was you. It sounds like in this case, it might be her who isn't ready to truly be friends.
  6. I understand. I may have some of what you envy, but there are other aspects where I share in it. I miss you over on the chat.
  7. I think that there usually needs to be some time and space unless the breakup was truly mutual. I know that when I've wanted to be friends with exes who broke up with me, it was more about wanting to regain their attention than actually rebuild the friendship. I am considering getting back in touch with an old boyfriend (from nearly 20 years ago!) as a result of this post though, because I'm at a point where I'm both no longer taking the breakup personally and really not interested as anything more than a friend.
  8. Beautiful and attraction are two totally separate concepts for me. I can be powerfully attracted to someone and not find them beautiful. Recognizing someone as beautiful doesn't mean I'm attracted to them. I'd have a bit of a hard time accepting it if someone called me beautiful, but I won't have trouble believing that they're attracted to me if they're showing signs of it. I mean, I may not always understand why. But I'll believe it.
  9. Mum's/Mom's Corner is still limited to members only. Or at least it was last time I looked while logged out, which was several months ago but after all the forum changes. Maybe one or two others? I'm not sure. I don't think anyone here knows why the change. Maybe it was an oversight in the transition process. Maybe it was to increase the searchability and bring more traffic to the site. My personal pet peeve is that blogs can be either public or limited only to specific individuals, but not limited to members only. It is probably safest just to treat it like everything is public, since clearly it might change at a later time.
  10. I'm starting to truly believe that August exists for no reason other than causing me great stress.

    1. JadeBleu15


      thank goodness it’s over! Hope September is better to you. (Hugs)

  11. I didn't mean to imply abuse caused it. Just that sex when you don't want it can feel like rape, even if you're technically consenting. We have not come to a mutually satisfactory solution. We have sex often enough to keep him basically happy. I deal with it, but don't know how long I can continue to do so. We also have an open relationship, and he has a girlfriend, which does relieve the pressure some, but not entirely. This isn't to say I totally hate sex or anything. Sometimes I'm willing. Sometimes I even initiate. Just not as often as he'd like.
  12. For me, I like the mental freedom of being non-monogamous. I like that I can crush on people and fantasize without guilt. I like that if the right situation came up, I could act on it. But I don't really seem to have a strong drive to do anything about it. I've been in a non-monogamous relationship for 17 years and haven't actually acted on it. But I also suspect being officially monogamous would bother me a lot.
  13. Having been more on the other side of this... In this sort of situation, people tend to put pressure on the less-interested partner to perform. Fake it until you make it, that sort of thing. In my experience, this doesn't work. It just feels like rape. I'm not saying you're doing anything wrong @NatureChick. Clearly you've been very patient for a long time, and you deserve a satisfying sex life. But bodily autonomy is so so important. Have possible physical causes been investigated? Would he be open to the possibility of an open relationship?
  14. I always went totally sex crazy during pregnancy, especially the second trimester. And that definitely extended to women, too. My theory is that it's a bonding thing - you're making the father more attached by keeping him happy, and building relationships with other women who will be supportive. It's one of my regrets that I never managed to hook up with a woman while I was pregnant, and since I don't expect to ever be pregnant again, it probably isn't happening this lifetime.
  15. You want me to make a decision, to move forward. And I know I need to. Every day moves me closer to the day when the choice is no longer under my control. 

    But the choice would be so much easier if you'd just be open and honest with me, one way or the other.

    1. moonbynight


      Of course, the obvious solution here is that if I am the one who is open and honest, I'll get an answer.