Platinum Shy-Bi Girl
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moonbynight last won the day on June 25 2016

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About moonbynight

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  1. I came into the thread knowing that I dreamed last night, but not able to remember what it was, and this jogged my memory, at least a little. There was a screen, and it said something I didn't like. Something absolutely horrible. I can't remember what. "I thought if this is a dream, and I look away and back again, the screen will say something different." It did - pictures of flowers. So I realized I actually was having a lucid dream. And then it must have gone non-lucid again, because I can't remember much of anything else about it.
  2. I think perhaps they changed it recently. After seeing your post, I went and found the PM I had with the password, and it didn't work.
  3. The thing for me is that online dating is so freaking appearance-driven. You can have the most witty, appealing profile ever, but if your picture doesn't push people's buttons, no one is going to see it. In real life, people have a spark. People who aren't conventionally attractive can still be incredibly appealing. That's much harder to convey in a picture. I almost always find people more attractive in person than in their pictures. So, from that perspective, I can understand someone heavily editing a photo just to get a foot in the door. After they removed my old picture for being too indistinct, I set my picture to a flattering angle cleavage shot, just to see what would happen. Got way more visitors after that. It's not even a particularly good photo. But boobs. People around here totally put up bad photos. Or maybe their photos are appealing to someone who isn't me, but I have a hard time seeing it. I'm not just talking duckface or something that some people seem to find attractive - I mean pictures taken at distinctly unflattering angles, or that emphasize facial blemishes or something. I don't get it. But they're braver than me in putting up a clear face shot, anyways.
  4. I had a crush on this guy once. I thought maybe he liked me back, but really wasn't sure. Years later, after we were both married to other people, he told me he used to have a crush on me. It was awesome. All the validation of a requited crush, none of the drama and heartbreak of an actual relationship between two people who really aren't right for eachother. And we would have had drama too, as he belonged to the Salvation Army.
  5. Hell is a hard thing to get over. It niggled at me for a long time after I stopped identifying as Christian and definitely contributed to my lack of sexual exploration prior to ending up in a heterosexual marriage. I think it's tough when you grow up with Christianty (and hell) as the default. For me, I never really believed in Christianity. I clearly remember questioning at age 6. But, at the same time, it was the paradigm I grew up in, and therefore hard to disregard entirely. What helped for me was recognizing that modern Christianity is a political construct, that a literal interpretation of the Bible really doesn't make much sense, and that Pascal's Wager is a false dichotomy.
  6. I will wear makeup in any context where men are held to the same standards.
  7. The problem with "truth" is that the actual truth may be something the person would never act on when sober. Alcohol lowers inhibitions. Her behavior may well represent the truth. But whether she'd be willing to follow up on it is another question. (This is a problem I run into sometimes. Not specifically with alcohol but in general. I get the sense of what someone's true feelings are, but there's something major keeping them from acting on, or even admitting, them.) Or it could just be that, because she went drunk, she went a little overboard on trying to put off the guy. But I do think it sounds like she enjoyed being close to you.
  8. Some days you save them, some days you don't.

  9. I would like to like Burt's Bees, but beeswax based chapsticks don't work well for me. They make my lips start flaking if I use them for more than a day or two. My husband likes to buy me chapstick, and buys it faster than I can use it, which is really saying a lot since I'm a chapstick addict. I tend to like actual Chapstick brand best, but don't have a favorite flavor.
  10. The only way you'd be likely to influence her is in giving her permission to be herself if she is not-straight too. You're not going to make her gay by coming out to her if she's not already.
  11. I think it's pretty normal. I've been attracted to both males and females from the start. I've gone through periods where I was very focused on men, and didn't really think much about women at all (I honestly can't remember one girlcrush during high school, though I had them before and after). On the other hand, I realized recently that it's been a very long time since I've had any real interest in men.
  12. I grew up in a very similar place (further south on the coast in CA). When I told people where I was from, they always said how much they would love to live there. But I never fit in there, and it's one of the most expensive areas in the US. My earning potential wouldn't really be higher than where I am now, but housing costs would be at least twice as much. At least. I see 1br apartments with a higher monthly rent than our mortgage on a 3br house on 3 acres. Lived somewhere else in CA that was a much better fit socially, but, like you said, too expensive. Now I live somewhere affordable, but socially it's rough. I know there are places that are a better balance. FWIW, growing up in coastal California pretty much ruined me for the climate anywhere else - I'm not particularly happy outside a range of about 60-78 degrees. But having lived a bunch of places with less ideal climates, I'll take social climate over physical climate any day. The problem with where I live now is that it doesn't have either.
  13. I don't hate where I'm living. I can tolerate it. I might tolerate it for the rest of my life. But there are places I'd love to move to for a number of reasons. I've moved so much in my adult life that the idea of moving once more doesn't really bother me. But preferably only once more. I hate moving, but getting to someplace that was a better fit would outweigh that.
  14. To a different person... of course you are. My whole life suddenly makes sense.
  15. "I'm addicted to you" is right up there on the list of things not to say if you want someone to believe your relationship is purely platonic.