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Found 3 results

  1. Im a young girl who has always fanazised being with an older woman.....I get so wet thinking about her teaching me what to do by doing it to me, and then having her make me do it to her.... I think about it all the time and have gone as far as to join online dating sights looking for older women... Can anyone else relate? or any older women out there looking to chat? -young and confused
  2. Recently, I came out as bisxual. I told my friend and she was so great about it. But i confessed i had no idea what I was doing or what I want. Being a lesbian herself, she said I should explore to figure things out. That is what helped her. A couple weeks later, I ended up messaging someone from school who was a few years ahead of me but we had mutual friends. It was nice and innocent enough, so we decided to meet up one night to talk after he got off work (it was the best time we could find). Very early into our conversation he asked me if I had lost my virginity and I answered honestly with a "no"; it has always been something I felt proud of being able to say. I felt a little weird about it him asking me so early but I ignored the feeling in my gut. When we met up, we talked for a while and walked around. It was a simple walk in the park at night, looking at the stars and learning about each other. Then, he pushed things further. I told him before that I wasn't that kind of girl but we were in the moment and I've never been in that kind of situation before. We didn't have sex but we did take it pretty far for our first time meeting. After that night, I realised a few things. I know in my gut that he would have pushed me further if I didn't keep stopping him and telling him to wait. Now even his name, the taste of the gum I was chewing that night, the memories of a lot of "firsts" make me feel sick to my stomach and feel a lot of regret. He told me he has slept with a lot of girls before and that he even had a list! I ignored all of these red flags and stayed when I now know that I should have left him right then. It was somethhing new and i wanted to figire out what i wanted. This was the to do it right!? Now I know I was wrong. He knew i was new to everything and nervous and he fed off that. He enjoyed the taking so many of my first-time experiences that I was not sure I was ready to have yet. I feel as if I were his prey. I feel like he used me for another name to add to his list and I don't know how to handle these thoughts. It's been about a month and it still gives me chills (not the good kind, the creepy kind). I've only talked to a couple of people about this and they all said "just block him" or "just find someone else in order to forget him" but I don't want to put myself in that kind of situation again. It has made me seriously think about who I am as a person and what it would mean if I were to use someone else to forget. I would be using someone as I feel I have been used. I don't want that; that's not who I am. I won't talk to him again and I ended things. But I still can't shake what has scarred my memory. He has become the memory that haunts my mind as if to remind myself of just how naive I was and capable of being made felt like a piece of shit that can pressured into things. I don't know what to do.
  3. Friday night was one of my crushes's birthday, so we went out with her and her boyfriend. We went to our local gay bar first, where she got very drunk, we did karaoke, and i got some lovely kisses and ass gropes before she and her boyfriend left (if you've seen my other posts, this is the friend who has asked me if i want to fool around). Husband and I stayed for a little longer before heading over to the bar that I work at and seeing some other friends. We have a close gay male friend (call him D) who is ALWAYS joke flirting with my husband and many of our other guy friends, which totally doesn't bother my husband like it might some straight men. My husband has even let him grope him through his jeans, and on occasion will allow a little kiss. All because it's all in good fun, right? Anyway, the other night, he got a little tipsy, and when we walked over to my bar and started talking to our friends, D was one of them. We were all laughing, joking, being ridiculous, when somehow, husband and D started making out. Like, actual making out, and husband seemed to kinda enjoy it? Of course, everyone started cheering them on, laughing etc. As I'm standing there, legs crossed because I'm feeling some sort of feeling between my legs haha. This isn't actually terribly out of the ordinary, my husband has never expressed interest in men (has always said he's definitely straight, but would be okay with certain amounts of touching with a guy) Anyway, the night progressed, we went home, went to bed, and I had to work the next day, as did my husband. About an hour after we'd left the house, he sent me a text saying he'd just remembered making out with D, and that he was a surprisingly good kisser. Then there was discussion of the road conditions, what to do for dinner, etc. Then about a half hour later, he sent another: "Also just got confirmation, apparently there was a point where my dick when into D's mouth last night for a brief second". I responded "Hahaha what? When? Not in front of people, i hope?" He said in the bathroom, and sent a screen shot of his conversation with D. Husband said to him "okay, i definitely remember they're was a grab in the bathroom, but other than that, I'm not sure", to which D responded "i put my mouth around it for a quick second, that was it". Husband responded with "lol okay, not gonna lie, the only thing i find strange about all of this is the fact that i could tell that my dick had been sucked. Apparently that's my superpower". WHAT. I'm at work, husband, and now my panties are soaked! After he sent the screenshot to me, he followed up by saying: "I sent him a message earlier saying that I remembered making out but my dick also felt like it had been sucked and wanted to double-check LOL" then "....so yeah. that's the story of how I discovered that I'm not necessarily bi, but really don't care lol". I've wondered for a bit what his tendencies towards men might mean.. any physical contact he has with men is generally under the pretense of joking around, shock value, and/or being somewhat intoxicated. But that's a WHOLE lot more than what most straight guys would be comfortable with. He's always said he wasn't bi, but once admitted he's probably only 75% straight. He's said he could never take a dick up the ass, but if anything, he MIGHT be able to give it. And in all of our friends' homoerotic joking and pretending to be in love with each other, he always states that he's the top. He and one of my other crushes's boyfriend frequently disappear from gatherings into a closet, the bathroom, wherever and reappear wearing each other's clothes, hair messed up, pants unzipped, shirts on inside out, etc. Obviously joking that they'd been fucking. He kissed a queen at a drag show once, and allowed 3 or 4 guys to all put their hands down his pants (also while drunk). All of this, in the context of joking. And now he's actually had his dick in another guy's mouth. I'm not convinced, because i like to trust what he says, and being that I'm bi, i don't think he'd feel the need to lie to me. However, i remember how i felt before i knew/accepted my bisexuality. I believed I was straight, but I would make out with women "for fun" or whatever. I'd joke that if anything ever happened to him, I'd be a lesbian (which is no longer a joke, and in fact, absolute reality.. i never plan on being with another man for the rest of my life, whether or not he's with me). I'd enjoy kissing women "because they were good at it" and it was different and exciting, but it was really that I enjoyed it because I'm attracted to women, and that part of me was buried at that point. In my experience of accepting I'm bi, my actions and reasons were very similar to what i see from him now. But of course everyone's experience is different. Honestly, I've wished he were bi for a while. Between the fact that our dynamic would be a bit more evenly balanced, and the fact that for the past year or two, dude-on-dude gets me ALLLL hot and bothered, I've hoped that his actions were an indicator that he might not be as straight as he thinks. Is he really just that free and open, or could he be beginning his own path to bisexuality?