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Found 57 results

  1. I often feel worse when I go back on dating sites. Before signing up, I’m hopeful that this time around, I’ll find someone to connect with. Then I get on, it’s okay for about a day, and then I get bummed out allllll over again. How’s it going for everyone else? Have you met someone recently? Any dates?
  2. I posted these pictures in another thread, but I thought people might enjoy them in their own thread. Please feel free to add similar pictures that you find
  3. I personally don't mind it. But what is your take on that?
  4. Morning my beautiful sisters: I feel that if we unite-like here-with no pretenses or judgement we can be so intensely connected as women. I thought starting a stream of positive and empowering quotes, poetry, tattoos, art, videos, music would be a great way to connect and inspire us all while we navigate our journey's here. Much Love Zu
  5. Disclaimer: I have no real right to start this thread. But things have to start somewhere. Everything below is personal opinion/thought and I encourage all of you to have your say. As many of you know/see there is an announcement banner at the top of the site for urgent donations and while those have been met it won't hold the site for very long at all. Now earlier on I posted in the chatbox with no right to do saying that because the quota had been met you shouldn't donate. It's not so much that I don't want you to, it's that I want you all to think carefully before you do. I was quick to donate because of my belief in the value of Shybi. I'm sure we all have our own feelings about the site and how our journeys have progressed because of this wonderful resource that @la-femme has run singlehandedly for a decade. I am truly grateful for this and I admire her for continuing to do so even though she has/is personally suffering as a result. For the site to move forward, it's going to need money, that's obvious. But for us as members this brings up a lot of questions and possibilities. There's also many ways that funding can be obtained in the long-term, but in the short-term if admin is reliant on us, we deserve a say and should not just blindly give without clear knowledge of what we receive. The digital world has advanced considerably since Shybi began. The only slight advantage I have here is that I do have some knowledge in this area. While some of us helped out today, we should have a say in the shaping of the site and we can't blindly give money and hope for the best it's not a solution and also there's always going to be current and future members who can't make financial contributions so it really is a case of coming together to make this a truly useful, accessible resource for those of us already here and all women who type bisexuality into a search engine. I am personally happy to support the site going forward, but I'm by no means writing this to impose myself as a leader - which makes this rather ironic But I do want to see the site grow, and remain because it's important and I will accept more responsibility if need be. Change is coming whether we like it or not, only by discussing it will the site be able to move forward. After giving my donation today, I felt sad not just because it could be lost, but because I've personally known for a long time the site wasn't at it's best - we've all been spoilt by having this place. Our site is a sinking ship and we can only help save it by taking a real interest and speaking up.
  6. This is me...after a long time. I haven’t been on shys in years and I guess it is still one place I can rant without any fear of repercussions. I haven’t been on here in ages, even though there was a period I spent hours chatting away on here with complete strangers until early hours of the morning. Was pretty helpful in whatever I was going through at the time. I think part of me not coming back on, was fear of a love lost, part of it was that I had found new love. I don’t even know if all of those friends I had made once upon a time on here still are active. I hope that if you’re all out there you’ve all found what we originally came on this website for. I know I did and I’m grateful for that. So much has happened since then that has allowed me to grow as a person and I believe what finally prompted me to come back on and write this is that I’m in therapy and finally taking the time to self reflect. I joined shys almost a decade ago after my first relationship ended. I posted about that relationship on here. It was a four year long secret I kept with my best friend, that was intense and beautiful and still remains a secret to this day from almost everyone we know including her husband. She finally did get married two years ago and guess who gave a heartfelt speech at her wedding referring to her as the sister I didn’t have lol. I’m so happy that she’s still a part of my life but we both have to pretend like what we had never happened and then our friendship gets frustrating at times especially when she makes comments about my sexuality, telling me to choose a man like she did because it’s just easier and so much less complicated. I was fortunate to meet someone on shys shortly after joining it all those years ago. Someone whom I developed something very special with which I thought was rare. While it didn’t amount to much despite the love and respect I had for her, I still cherish her friendship to this day. Lastly, my most recent relationship, six years. She was the most real, legit relationship I had. I could finally be open about her, introduce her to my friends and wake up next to her when she stayed over. She was everything I could have asked for smart, beautiful, ambitious, athletic, and mostly she just loved me. She openly loved me...took care of me, was possessive about me in a way that I hadn’t experienced before. I thought she was the one I’d come out to my parents for. Unfortunately, the idea of being with a woman was not part of her plan and now six years later she still can’t come to terms being with me and decided to end our relationship. The reality is that every one of my exes has opted to be with men over me. The other reality is that through all my relationships, I have never been with a man. I dated them and was attracted to them but I never fell for anyone like I did with the women I’ve been with. I know I’m more attracted to bisexual women. Maybe part of it is my own discomfort at embracing being a lesbian or part of it is the challenge of convincing a woman who has only ever been with men of how amazing girl on girl sex can be. Maybe part of it is that I just find sexual fluidity attractive, the idea that it’s not about your gender but about who you are as a person that someone finds lovable. But I guess biologically speaking I am still a Virgin at 33 having only ever been with women. I don’t know if that makes me a default lesbian but I do feel I’m still attracted to men. And now after being with a woman so long and being rejected, I’m starting to wonder if I’m missing out on something lol. I’m still hurting, by no means ready to get into another serious relationship but I feel like I failed again and my self esteem is shot. I’ve decided to give up on women for now and figure out if I’m really gay or actually still bisexual. Thing is it’s been so long since I’ve even dated a guy that I don’t know what I’m doing and I’m kind of scared at being so much older, inexperienced, and navigating my way through this for the first time. I know most women come on here having been with men but not with a woman. Here I am with the opposite problem lol. I don’t know why I typed all this out, just felt like ranting and I thought this would probably be the best place vent frustrations about my confused sexuality. I don’t know if anyone will read this. But maybe someone can relate at least to the heartache part.
  7. Grrrrr! So frustrating! WTH am I doing wrong?! I’ve seen girls with pics of themselves in thongs, bikinis, pasties... I don’t have anything remotely similar and yet I keep getting banned Anyone else experience this problem?!
  8. I met a woman through a meet-up group. Very lovely, pretty girl. We have so much in common and have been talking for days straight, but, we're so very different. She talks of casual dating, which I don't do and I don't have the time for. She was recently dating one woman, but that fell through; all of the women she's seriously dated are "tom boys," which I am not. During our convos, she mentions that she's limiting herself in terms of dating because of her "high standards." Huh? With guys, this was NEVER talked about. I never have had this experience with a guy. They never discussed other women with me or what they were doing to actively limit themselves from the dating pool. I overlook it, maybe she's just different. Mind you, through out our convos, when she puts up a boundary and says she is or isn't some way or into something, I respect it. I get it. Today, we were talking about the same damn thing. About how she wouldn't lower her standards for any girl. I recommended dating sites to her, to which she refused and said it had to happen organically. At this point, I totally feel like a friend. I mean, I'm talking to you like I"m your buddy. WTH? Why are we even talking about this when we should be getting to know each other (and this has happened every day we've spoken). I feel like if she's going to talk to me like a friend, I'm going to lower my expectations of her and treat her in kind. I tell her, "She's out there for you. I know it. And I also know that you and I are going to make such good friends." I wasn't being bitchy. We do have a lot in common and as she's done to me, I wanted to assert that boundary. Her reply was: WTH? What just happened? Did you totally just friendzone me? Well that's a first! And a bunch of laughing smiley faces. I told her, "I'm into you, but the way you're speaking to me has me feeling we're just on two different pages." Last text from her: Wow. Okay. Well nice getting to know you. Take care of yourself. Be well." And now I"m totally triggered because a woman that royally screwed me over (and I allowed it to happen, completely) said the SAME EXACT THING. "Be well." And then a few hours later, she'd come back and I'd do it all over again. I'm so new to knowing what I like and don't like. What's acceptable and what's not. What feels good and what feels bad. Part of this was me; for sure... but is it the norm for women to talk about other women while actively pursuing you or is this what I'm attracting into my life. She's a lovely person. That's too bad. I asserted my own boundary (total "therapy" talk) and she didn't want that. It was too confusing; we were texting all day and talking (which, to be honest, had me distracted from things I should be doing). Back to the drawing board.
  9. I run into many "what would you do" questions while in the dating world. Rather than create different threads, will just put in this one So new scenario (I'm really trying to get out of "hermit" mode and back into dating).: Talking to a woman now who fits well with me on paper. Verified her and everything. Seems normal (so far), arranging an actual date, etc. BUT this is the second time she's called herself ugly. The first time, she said she's not nearly as pretty as I am, Okay, we have an exchange about that. Now she's done it again and a similar exchange: Her: Us ugly people are usually pretty funny. Me: (Trying to be light hearted) I think you just want to hear me compliment you... Her: I don't need anyone to compliment me. I'm intelligent, strong, and capable! This throws me off. I'm recovering from PTSD and all that jazz, so my radar is wonky. I'm always second-guessing these situations and my friends tell me I"m too analytical for my own good. But this exchange makes me go: huh? When we started talking I asked her what her nickname is and she said my friends call me "Kitty or Beautiful." So what the hell are the ugly comments about? I haven't responded. It feels so awkward to segue into something else... And she is very, very pretty. She hangs out with a lot of masculine looking women, so she def stands out in the group- all dolled up and flawless make-up. Leaves me shrugging my shoulders.
  10. I’m suddenly very confused. For about a month, I was very into dom/sub porn and fantasies, with me being the submissive partner. The “good girl.” Being spanked, told what to do, etc. My orgasms were very intense and I couldn’t get enough. Mind you, I’ve been into this since I began questioning my sexuality, but for a time, I was REALLYYYYY into it. About two weeks ago, that very much changed. I’m now into me telling the woman what to do. Not exactly dom/sub, but I’m def the aggressor. I have fantasies about guiding the woman and telling her what to do. While in both cases the women I fantasize about are femme, the latter is the more adorable type. Someone I want to take care of, while the former is someone who takes care of me. I can’t orgasm to the thoughts of being with a more dom partner. It does nothing for me. It just happened overnight. WTF?! Has anyone experienced this? It’s like night and day. I wish I could say I go back-and-forth between the scenarios, but I don’t. It’s like one day someone flipped a switch in me and it just doesn’t appeal to me and now I’m all in my head about it Has this happened to anyone else? It’s leaking into my personal life when I met a younger, very adorable woman tonight (too young for me) and we hit it off tremendously. I’ve met her once before and I found myself missing her. When she came over and sat next to me to talk (well, I was in a group) I had conflicting feelings. For the past two years, I’ve been attracted to a more dominant woman. Now suddenly, I’m drawn to someone adorable and charming, who I can take care of. And this means my sexual predilections change as well.
  11. Hey, I though I would open this topic because I've been 'spamming' Inspiring pictures of women with women with text posts about inspiring female couples and friendships, but it should probably stay focused on images, so maybe it deserves a separate topic. I will publish some posts that are already there and add new ones, and I invite you to add any couples or people who you think would fit this topic.
  12. My male best friend says that he cannot open up to me and that I'm very judgmental. He says he cannot be truthful about the women he's talking to and therefore, holds back a lot. His situation: He was recently fired from his job. Stays at home all day while living w/his parents and admittedly, spends most of his day on dating sites. Most of his conversations revolve around the women he's talking to. Sometimes I find myself wondering if they are really women, just because I've been catfished. He rarely meets many of the women he talks to (online). He's gone w/me to meet-up groups and he barely says a word to anyone else besides me. I'm trying to be there for him and get him acclimated to meeting people in person (this also helps me make new acquaintances). When he talks to a woman on the regular, he'll ask me for my opinion. My opinion is that now is not the time for a relationship (given his situation), but that it doesn't hurt to talk to people. I try to steer him towards other topics, like a dream that he wants to accomplish or going to the gym, but he's really obsessed w/the topic of dating. This morning he told me that he can't really talk to me. I told him I did listen to him in those months in the very beginning, but that now it's all he wants to talk about. When we're out, he's usually on his phone on a dating site. He's been on multiple sites for a year and a half now. I do ask him for more info about these women he's talking to. Most of them are older women w/children (he doesn't have any) and some of them seem to raise red flags (they ask him to move in together, maybe after a date or two). I don't really know how to discuss the topic w/him anymore. I gave him my honest view of it today, that I think in general it's fine to get to know people, but that with the limitations of his situation, it's prob not the time for a serious relationship (which is what he's pining after). His response was, "See, why do you think I'm not ready? Why do you get to say when I'm ready?!" He also doesn't tell these ladies the truth about his situation, that he's unemployed and living w/his parents while getting back on his feet. I know he's very lost and confused and the addiction to the dating site is a distraction from what's really going on, but if I broach those topics or ask him to see a therapist, he becomes angry and immediately shuts down. I don't know what to do. I feel like talking to him about what now seems to be an obsession would only enable him. I also want to be a good friend, one who listens w/o judgment, but also has their highest good in mind. I'm not sure what the right thing to do is...
  13. A woman looking at The Sleepers by Gustave Courbet - source unknown The previous blog post in this series ended with a brief description of the The Sleepers which many feel is one of the most important LGBpaintings in history for the honest and sympathetic depiction of same-sex sexuality. This post reviews the artistic environment of works featuring women with women produced around the time that Courbet painted The Sleepers. Women Bathing at the Brook - Ferdinand Georg Waldmuller (1848) Many paintings were produced in the 17th to 19th century depicting a group of young women bathing together, usually naked, for the pleasure of male viewers. Often the bathers are shown in languid poses suggesting ready availability for the viewer(s) but here Waldmuller shows the women interested in something that has happened beyond the edge of the painting creating some mystery and tension. Courage, Anxiety and Despair: Watching the Battle - James Sant (c.1850) This painting by Sant is atypical of the vast majority of 19th century paintings of women, most of which show domestic scenes and lives lived mostly separately from the world of men and affairs of the world. Here Sant shows us a scene of battle that we don't often see - from a female point of view and how they are affected by and respond to organized male violence. A Morning. The Dance of the Nymphs - Jean-Baptiste-Camille Corot (1850-1851) The title of this painting does not make specific reference to ancient mythology but the scene is reminiscent of many from the past which featured the nymphs of Diana or Venus celebrating life, womanhood and perhaps Bacchus. These more modern dancing women are clothed and could be seen as ballet dancers celebrating nature on a natural stage. Promenade - Constant-Emile Troyon (c. 1850s) The 19th century saw unprecedented improvements in living standards which allowed greater numbers of women to have leisure time to spend, usually with other women, on strolls in gardens, or parks, or sharing confidences and the joys of life as a woman in the industrializing West. The Ball Gown - Jules Trayer (1860) Along the Arno to the Cascine - Giuseppe Abbati (1862) Bringing Home the May - Peach Robinson (1862) This photograph is an example of the movement known as Pictorialsim which was dedicated to advancing photography as a legitimate form of imaginative fine art and not just a technology for static portraits. Pictorialists carefully planned their scenes using models, costumes and sometimes multiple exposures which were combined into a single composite image. Here Robinson creates a romantic and idealized representation of country life. First Born - Gustave-Leonard de Jonghe (1863) Red Shirts Staplers - Odoardo Borrani (1863) Elegant Women on the Beach - Eugene Louis Boudin (1863) Buying Fruit and Vegetables at the Night Market - Petrus Van Schendel (1863) Listening to the News of the Day - Gerolamo Induno (1864) Restful Afternoon - Charles Hue (c.1864) A Walk - Silvestro Lega (1864) Two Women in a Clearing - Louis Dericks (1864) Two Women in the Garden of Castiglioncello - Giovanni Fattori (1864-5) Spring - Jacques James Tissot (1865) Livorno Waterholes - Giovanni Fattori (1865) Some artists chose to depict women together in rural peasant scenes as a more honest and real representation of most womens' lives. Forbidden Fruit - Auguste Toulmouche (1865) The rising standards of living included the growth of book publishing and reading and many paintings depict women engaged with books. Sate sponsored secular education of girls and women emerged in the West in the middle of 19th century. Women Dancing in a Brothel - Constantin Guys (c.1865) Guys was one of the Realist artists in Paris who traveled the streets and painted what he saw. Here he shows us the social life of women with other women inside a brothel. Women in the Garden - Claude Monet (1866) The Impressionists were a group of artists that succeeded the Realists in France as an important counter-cultural artistic community. Like the Realists they were dedicated to painting everyday life but pioneered painting plein-air (outdoors) using palettes of bright, vibrant colours. The Visit to the Artist's Sudio - Louis Marie Joseph Ridel (1866) Painting as a profession was dominated by males in the 19th century as it had been for centuries but it became both increasingly acceptable for women to become painters and achievable with prosperous families financially supporting their daughters aspirations. In Sun - Vincenzo Cabianca (1866) The Secret - Jules Salles-Wagner (c.1866) The Reluctant Bride - Auguste Toulmouche (1866) Summer Days - Julia Margaret Cameron (1866) The new technology of photography attracted many artistic talents to explore the potential of the medium. Julia Margaret Cameron (1815-1879) emerged as one of the finest portraitists of the nineteenth century - in any medium. She took up photography in her late forties and produced over a thousand images over 14 years. Promenade - Paul Cézanne (1866) Cézanne, one of the Impressionists, shows us via the arrangement of the figures, the reality of relations between the sexes in the 19th century. The men are standing indicating their greater status and are engaged in discussing important matters of the day while their wives are parked on a bench waiting silently for the men to conclude their conversation. Minerva and the Graces - Marc-Charles-Gabriel Gleyre (1866) Apricots - Albert Joseph Moore (1866) The Hermitage at Pontoise - Camille Pissarro (1867) Pissarro was one of the pioneers of Impressionism and he painted outdoors in rural France for most of his life. Here he completes a scene of tranquil serenity with a genial meeting on the road of two women, one a young mother. Blind Man's Bluff - Charles Baugniet (c.1867) The Confidence - James Tissot (1867) Six Bathers - Adolphe-Joseph Thomas Monticelli (c.1867) After the Manner of the Elgin Marbles - Julia Margaret Cameron (1867) The Drawing Lesson - Charles Baugniet (c.1867) An Interior with Japanese Objects - Juan Leon Palliere (c.1867) Collecting Water - Edward John Cobbett (c.1867) Confidences - Jules Adolphe Goupil (1867) Spring's New Arrivals - Charles Baugniet (c.1867) The Visit - Alfred Emile Leopold Stevens (c.1867) The Love Letter - Gustave Léonard de Jonghe (1867) A Shared Moment - Cesare Felix Georges Dell'Acqua (1868) Young Women of Sparta - Jean-Baptiste Camille Corot (c.1868) The musician in the foreground appears bored, perhaps melancholic since her talents aren't appreciated by the women in the background, who are practicing their hand-to-hand combat skills as warriors for militaristic Sparta. The Weeders - Jules Breton (1868) Quartet of Musicians - Albert Joseph Moore (1868) Moore creates visual tension here by his arrangement of the figures. The standing women and sitting men is a flip of what one would expect within a patriarchy and the close embrace of the two women suggests a romantic connection. Allegory of Lust for Life - Hans Makart (1868) Spring Scene - Anselm Feuerbach (1868) The Bath - Marc Charles Gabriel Gleyre (1868) The Eavesdropper - Carl Heinrich Hoff (1868) Confidences - Cristiano Banti (1868) Women's Art Class - Louis Lang (c.1868) Elegant Ladies at the Baths - Raffaello Sorbi (1868) The Visit - Alfred Émile Léopold Stevens (c.1869) A Visit to the Haunted Chamber - William Frederick Yeames (1869) Ladies Playing Billiards - Charles Edouard Boutibonne (1869) The Diary - Auguste Toulmouche (c.1869) Young Ladies Looking at Japanese Objects - James Tissot (1869) Two Seated Women - Mary Cassatt (1869) The Impressionists considered themselves socially progressive and deliberately included both men and women among their ranks; Cassatt and another woman Berthe Morisot were prominent members. Despite being accepted as an artist of equal merit she was limited by the range of subjects she could paint as she was not able to move as freely around Paris and rural France as her male colleagues could. At the Opera - Charles Edouard Boutibonne (1869) The Hay Field - Thomas Armstrong (1869) The Daydreams - Auguste Toulmouche (c.1869) Young Women Looking at Japanese Objects - James Tissot (c.1869-1870) A Surprising Visit - Otto Wilhelm Eduard Erdmann (1870) Rural Landscape - Ernesto Rayper (1870) A Beach Stroll - Frederik Hendrik Kaemmerer (1870) Bathers - Paul Cézanne (1870) Cézanne appears to be anticipating future artistic movements with this painting, which is more about shapes and colours than it is about the portrayal of soft, voluptuous bodies of women. These figures look cold, and perhaps uncomfortable, after their swim in the dark of night. A tintype from 1870. A stand was often used for the subjects to lean against to prevent movement which would result in image blurring. Glance Exchanged - Frederik Henrdik Kaemmerer (c.1870) The arrangement of the seated men and women suggests that the exchanged glance is between two women, perhaps a moment of attraction and/or flirtation. Back From the Dance - Giuseppe de Nittis (1870) The Washerwomen of the Breton Coast - Jules Breton (1870) Fannie (née Heriot), Lady Wentworth; possibly Maria Colclough Turner (née Heriot, later Blyth) - W. & D. Downey (1870) The Visit - Albert Roosenboom (c.1870) The Love Letter - Petrus van Schendel (1870) By the Well - Jozsef Molnar (c.1870) La Toilette - Frédéric Bazille (1870) This painting belongs to a genre that reflects the Wests' fascination with the Orient/Middle East and depicts a scene within a harem. The intended audience were males, who enjoy the nudity and the subtext of lesbian sexuality. There were a great number of harem related works produced in the 19th century but I've chosen to include only a few of them in this series of blog posts. The next post will continue with works produced during the 1870s.
  14. I feel so bad that I'm here sulking and am only semi happy for her. I'm jealous! I'm upset at my self for being in love with someone who I never had a chance of being with. I know she deserves this proposal. I know she loves him and is crazy about him just enough to say "Yes" after only a year of knowing him!! I'm disappointed that I couldn't go on FB and exclaim my excitement like all her other friends and loved ones. I'm feeling sucky about feeling sucky! Of course I want her happy and and wish that all of her dreams would eventually come true. I'm disappointed that despite knowing this may very well be "written in the stars"; in the making for a long time, I'm still wanting her to be with me. I'm selfish and borderline delusional. Is it possible to remain friends while I'm hopelessly in love with her? Can I ever genuinely support her?
  15. What makes Women Beautiful... Is it here soft flowing hair or her flush cheeks Is it here arched brows or the way her eyes blink Is it the way she speaks or the way she feels Is it the things she wears or her touch that gives you chills Is it the way she walks all grand and poised Is it the way that she smiles so full of joy What do you think it is that makes women Beautiful....
  16. (I didn't know which forum to post this in so I'm posting it twice, sorry to spam!) I've recently started seeing a guy but we are not yet in a relationship, he's funny and kind but I still can't get a girl I work with out of my head. I know she is bisexual too but I don't know how she feels about me, I'm far too shy and afraid of compromising our friendship than to say anything to her. I feel this magnetic energy when I talk to her that I've never felt with anyone else before. I don't know what to do! Arghhh. What are some signs that she may feel the same way? Or should I just try and get over my crush? I asked her to meet me for drinks one time and we ended up getting dinner, she said we should do it again sometime but we never did. I don't want to double text her and look desperate because I was the last one to message her (weeks ago, which is odd that she never replied although she always comes up to me in work for a chat). Sorry about the rant but I needed to get this off my chest. Someone please tell me what to do. I'm only 19 and super inexperienced at love.
  17. I just read a Greek article because of the day,about why women leave from a relationship or cheat even if they love their significant other.So the question was when they do that? I will try to translate it alone so bear with me If someone wants to analyze the psychology and the way a woman is thinking will have to ruin a lot of paper Besides every woman is different but all need the same thing in a relationship:presence .(the literal translation is intense presence) Anything less causes women to want to leave,bad reactions and unhappiness. It is from the few times we can be absolutely sure about something that concerns women.Even if their significant other is far away for business or they live in the same house they always have to find ways to show that they care about her,that they are thinking about her and in general that they are present. A woman is choosing to be with someone first of all because she wants to spend time with them.She has this need to spend her time with someone that makes her laugh and take her out of her routine,that gives her motives and the chance to dream of a better future.Maybe it's a little bit egoistic from her part,but each one of us is absolutely happy only when we feel that we are a priority in the life of the person we love. A woman wants to feel that the other one loves spending time with her,wants to do new stuff ,wants the same excitement in bed like when you first met and the same intense passion.Every woman want to be wanted!! It is as simple as that. she wants all that or else she will get tired at some point.she gets tired of you being absent all the time.To always think of financial and job problems and not let a space for her in your mind.She gets tired feeling that she is coming after your friends or family.Gets tired of trying to wake you up from where you have fallen asleep so you can go out for a cup of coffee or dinner.She gets tired of having to remind you your anniversaries and every little thing she finds so you can spend some time together.She gets tired being always the one to make the first move every time and chase you for sex. And when a woman just had enough of loving you then she will have a break down and in your eyes she will become the worst person on earth.You will see another version of her,a bad self that you created through your indifference. You might even believe that you are the victim if she cheats or abandon you,but you are the same or maybe even more guilty than her.Because you didn't listen her silence and her complaints.Because you refused to see the unhappiness in her eyes ,because you were not willing.You pushed her away from you and even maybe to the arms of someone that made her feel desirable and unique again.Someone that managed what you failed to do.To chase the loneliness away. Because if you love her with your way and not the way she needs to be loved then what did you do?If you need effort to suit her in your schedule and your every day thoughts then maybe you are the one that should take your presence out of her life.A presence that was always absence? Besides if you won't leave ,eventually she will find the strength to leave.Because no one and especially a woman wasn't born to be squeezed to someone elses life.
  18. Since so many of you have unrequited crushes thought you might have an insight into what's happened to me. I'm in a weird numb emotional state at the moment and wondered if anyone has been in a similar situation. I've been in love / madly infatuated with my straight (bi-curious maybe) friend for well over 5 years. We became good friends but she wasn't interested in anything more. I accepted that and settled for a very one-sided friendship. I would do most of the organising of get togethers and I put far more into 'us' than she ever did. I could never bare the thought of not having her in my life so I was willing to always do more for her. Guess I was like a love sick puppy. Now after many years of this set-up I've finally come to realise just how unhealthy this relationship is. And although there is still some attraction there I have fallen out of infatuation with her. Its like everything I admired and thought about her has just dropped away and instead of thinking she is this amazing Goddess of a woman I now see her for what she is, flawed like the rest of us ! In fact she has treated me quite poorly on many an occasion, but I always forgave. She is doesn't have the qualities that make a friend and its taken me this long to come out of an all encompassing 'spell'. It has to be for the best that this has ended, as it has been very emotionally exhausting. But I am left feeling anxious and very lost. I've cried a lot, felt angry and now just a bit confused. I should be feeling liberated, right ? What's going on. ?
  19. So I just have a question, if someone has been taking abuse through communication will it eventually turn physical?
  20. Just thought I'd share this here. It's a short story I wrote, maybe you'll like it? I'm lostdmw on deviant art, just started posting there not long so and, I dunno, I'm not finding an audience. Anyway, please tell me what you think.
  21. Exactly that!What happens when you meet the right person at the wrong time?When you never thought that you are not with the right one to begin with. Human beings are complicated and because we are emotionally complicated too we manage to make situations complicated.Relationships fail not only because the other person turns out to be the wrong one but also because you yourself aren't the person you need to be. Life is unpredictable we know that but some times life is cruel.Sometimes we meet the right person but the timing is so wrong for whatever reasons that we can't do anything about it. So,what you do?What happens when you meet the right person for you at the wrong time?!
  22. I am curious to know what the women in this forum want from a woman in terms of their bi relationships. Are you looking for casual sexual encounters, an emotional connection too, or a full-blown love affair? There are quite a few posts where people seem to think that they can control the emotional side of things once they begin to have a sexual relationship with a woman, and I'm sure many of us know that this isn't the case. Sex with a woman can be an extremely intense and powerful experience (and downright explosive!), very different from sex with a man (even one you are genuinely in love with), so it isn't to be underestimated. For those of you who are in more than one relationship and/or who are in a relationship with a woman who is involved with someone else, how do you handle jealousy and other emotional complications? I personally find navigating the emotional landscape of two relationships at once very difficult, and have sometimes felt consumed with jealousy about my lover being with her boyfriend/husband, even though I am with someone else too (I know, it's totally hypocritical, but it's very difficult to control this sort of thing...).
  23. Hi ladies, my name is Alyssa. I've been lurking on the site for a minute but decided to finally introduce myself. I'm 23 and I live in Jacksonville, FL. I recently made the decision at the start of the new year to start dating women exclusively. I'm super excited, but also very nervous about taking this step in my life. I've come out to a couple of my close friends but haven't yet told any family members. I've felt attraction for other women for about seven years, since I was a junior in high school. I've tried rationalizing it away and thinking it was just a phase or something but as time has gone on my desire for women has become almost a hunger. My senior year in college I started attending some LGBT events and made a lot of new friends but thought maybe it was just a curiosity I needed to scratch. But for the past year or so, I think about women all the time. With Valentine's Day coming up, I'm a little sad I don't have that special lady to spend it with and that's part of the reason I decided to introduce myself now to just fellowship with like-minded ladies who may be experiencing something similar. I'm really glad to be here and I look forward to meeting some great new people. XOXO, Alyssa
  24. Anyone has a crush on anyone from Shybi? You don't have to tell us who it is, just yes or a no would suffice
  25. My gf lives in the UK and im from Australia. We have had phone sex, online sex etc in our 6 month relationship but i feel like real life might be a bit different. We are both from sheltered south asian families so this will be our first everything together including first kiss as embarrassing as it sounds. I am of Hindu background and she is of Muslim.background but lived in UK all her life. . Its been hard to come to terms with our sexual orientations. I never thought i would explore this side till i met her. In our 6 months so far we have not had any issues. Our main issues will be intolerance and homophobia from the outside world. She is coming at a time when i have a work placement in a rural area away from.my family and friends so we can just be together and forget the outside world. Even when my family later encouraged to find a bf i never found someone i had enough emotional connection with to kiss. The guys i met online never had that emotional connection i have with my gf. I am hoping our first time to be a day together. As in the experience should last for a day at least. She asked me what lingerie i like for her so i told her the type and colour with garters so will request her to wear it on that day. I feel like i dont want to rush things so my idea of foreplay is going to be long. 1. Spend a day doing fun and adventurous activities she likes such as hiking and in between getting time for kissing. 2. First kiss as the sun sets on the beach and the waves gently caress our partially naked legs. Then going for a long walk along the beach while holding hands and caressing each other. 3. Candlelight dinner by the beach. Plus use of food as a tool to enhance intimacy. Whipped cream, melted chocolate, blindfolding her while she guesses the exotic fruits i eat off her body. https://www.google.com.au/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/gmp2736/food-sex/&ved=2ahUKEwjP0fv2luDYAhXHULwKHdICAoAQFjADegQIDxAB&usg=AOvVaw0Ss4LbINrd7Jwe_aqS9Js4&cf=1 4. Then heading to our romantically set out beach cabin with candlelight, rose petals and her favourite flowers. Her favourite flowers and music playing. She likes the song "love is in the air" and symphony. Or boyz2men "i'll make love to you." So hoping to slow dance while kissing her neck. We plan to go to these rainbow dance classes together where same sex couples and others can dance. I want to be able to do those dipping kisses. 5. Kissing and caressing her entire body from.top to toe while she is clothed. Undressing her bit by bit and kissing the freshly exposed skin from her upper chest, shoulders, cleavage, upper arms, arm pits and abdomen. Unhooking her bra then caressing/kissing her back. Taking a strap off an arm caressing/kissing the arm then doing the same on the other side. Likewise she can do the same to me. 6. Showering together so we can soap each other and kiss under the water 7. Or being in a bathtub together with rose petals in the water surrounded by candlelight. Feeding each other fruits and champagne. Telling her how lucky i am to know her and sharing poems we have written to each other over the 9 months. 7.5 with the skin being the largest sex organ with number of nerve endings ot definitely needs focus. Like smooth satin gliding over surface i will touch her gently and slowly with the tip of my middle finger over her shoulders, jaw, cheekbones, neck, arm, legs, feet, buttock, back of knees and sides. Then would run my fingertips over her body in wavy strokes. Using the heel of my palm i would use gliding and long strokes all over her body to relax her and more responsive. 8. A whole body massage from her feet, ankles, soles of her foot up her legs while using her favourite massage oil. Possibly also a feather or rose petal. Stroking and caressing her legs and feet. I feel like feet often get neglected and should be given extra attention. Then going from her fingers, up her hands and arms. Before i massage her scalp, face, neck, shoulders and back. At the end would be breast, nipples, knee, inner thighs and vaginal/clitoral massage with her permission. Hopefully i can help her have a few orgasms before we even start oral. On the phone when i talk about kissing/nibbling/sucking body parts she does orgasm. https://www.livestrong.com/article/35692-give-sensual-full-body-massage/ https://consciouslifenews.com/bring-woman-orgasm-tantric-clitoral-massage/11123208/ https://www.google.com.au/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DgWZ2hBNE3W8&ved=2ahUKEwjdvK_HouDYAhWMi5QKHdSUD6wQFjAGegQICRAB&usg=AOvVaw0g1Ri4fzz_iUMAoYkQ8w0e Side effect of long distance relationships you end up having a good imagination and doing a lot of research while u are away from the person. The following parts are inspires from betterloverseminar a subcontinental sex ed column. 8. Whole body foreplay - running my fingers through her hair, kissing her forehead, eyebrows, eyes, cheeks, jawline, caressing her shoulders, fondling her ear lobes caressing her neck, stroking sides of arms, stroking back, fondling her buttocks, kissing her abdomen, stroking her inner thighs, nibbling her calves, licking and kissing the back of her knees, nibbling back of her neck, licking her armpits, sucking her ear lobes, nibbling undersides of her breasts, then covering her back with soft kisses and nibbling. Contrasting hot and cold sensations by first having something hot then kissing her then having an ice cube in my mouth for fee seconds then kissing her. Then to kiss her lips. But to gently move any hair out of her face so i can see all of her face. Holding her head and neck in my hands while kissing. Then when kissing would caress her face, up and down her back, her side,with fingers through her hair, her ear lobes, thighs and her arms, Then would hold her waist tight while kissing her mouth. https://www.google.com.au/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=http://stylesatlife.com/articles/different-types-of-kisses/&ved=0ahUKEwjy0vX2sODYAhVFlJQKHcg5BB8QFghGMAQ&usg=AOvVaw1zU36oYWMCwolfk0il7J1M breasts and her vulva at the end. Erogenous zones including the lesser known ones. Making sure to kiss, nibble, lick areas as appropriate. https://www.google.com.au/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/love-sex/the-lesser-known-erogenous-zones-and-how-to-find-them-10419267.html&ved=0ahUKEwj47rzeseDYAhUEE7wKHaivCssQFggyMAI&usg=AOvVaw2lFaSgHgGu80kwnavu0AlY 9. Focusing on the breasts From the base of the breast i plan to kiss, nibble and lick till i complete a circular round. Then to go up an inch higher and do the same in circular motions up to the areola to increase anticipation which can be a turn on. Then i would kiss the circular patch of the areola with the tip of my tongue. Finally would lick the nipple then lightly blow on it causing contrasting sensations of heat/moisture and then cooling sensation. Then would lower my mouth to cover her nipples with the moist warmth of the mouth with my tongue flicking around it internally. While taking the nipple in my mouth would lick, suck and use ny tongue around it while kneading her breast. Then would lick honey off from all over her breast with the flat of my tongue. While my mouth is on her breast i would gently squeeze one hand and fondle the breast with the other hand. Making sure i get feedback and letting her know how much i enjoy it. Not missing the areas between, under and around the breast. 10. Oral I will let her know im hungry and hoping for a meal only she can provide me.. Following a path kissing, licking, nuzzling down from her breasts, abdomen, knees, inner thighs etx Would want to kiss, nibble with my lips and lick my way from her inner thighs to her vulva Would then kiss and lick the area around the vulva. Then lick from the bottom of her vagina to the clitoris. Licking the outer lips with my tongue then nibbling. Then would move my tongue to lick her inner lips then the opening of her vagina circling around it, inserting my tongue inside moving it up, down and around. Then follow with a finger or 2. After she is fully aroused would lick her clitoris. Licking the underside of the clitoris and then the sides before direct stimulation on the clitoral hood when she is fully aroused. I will have my mouth on her vulva and then flick by her clitoris every 10 seconds. Once aroused i will suck her clitoris into my mouth and then rapidly flick it with my tongue internally. Going slowly with the speed of it. I will let her know how much i love giving her oral, there is no hurry and how much i want to enjoy each moment and how much i love the aroma and taste of her & ask for feedback regarding whether it is too intense or where she wants me to be. 11. Fingers Trim fingertips gently teasing from the vulva, to the inner thighs, her pubis to the perineum(area between vagina to anus) Would probably need decent amount of lubrication as would she. You can never have too much lubrication. Oral sex and insertion of 2 fingers etc Mixture of oral and fingers. 12. Tribbing and scissoring if she is ok with it and will maybe leave other fancy positions, any toys ot strap on etc to future love sessions if she is interested https://www.google.com.au/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://sex.sofeminine.co.uk/relationships/album961435/lesbian-kama-sutra-100-sex-positions-for-women-0.html&ved=2ahUKEwj0kIfSreDYAhUMgbwKHaqoB0wQFjAAegQIEBAB&usg=AOvVaw2V4bGgR55X1jL81CiB3uXZ 13. Cuddles and holding her after and telling her what she means to me and how lucky i am to know her and to have her be my soulmate in life 14.. Breakfast in bed with use of food in a sensual way like above. I guess it may seem like im putting pressure on myself but i want her to have a magical time. Apart from myself and my ideas i dont have much in the way of experience to offer her. But i do have a lot of enthusiasm. If there are any romantic movie sterotypes ive forgotten please let me know. My gf is a romantic like me so we're both into cheesy activities. I will bring up these ideas with her but i want some elements to be a surprise. My question is what more you would have liked in foreplay for your first time? And also want to give hope to the long distance couples out there. People say it wont work but if you have love, commitment and a pathway for your relationship no distance can create distanve between 2 hearts. I never thought living in Australia i would fall in love with a british girl with a hot accent who would love me enough to think about moving permanently but i have. My gf is aware of me posting stuff online about our relationship and she is ok with it. Any other romantic suggestions are welcome. Cant discuss this with too many of my friends.