NoOne

Ciao! No one here :)

15 posts in this topic

Hello All!  I just found this site today.  In college I was pretty certain I was bi, then after having my first boyfriend (late bloomer), I think I was in denial of it or maybe just bottled it away for a while.  I started noticing my attractions to women again in the last year, and tried talking with my now boyfriend about it, but he is not nearly as understanding or open-minded,  So I went searching for a safe space to discuss this sort of thing.

Happy to be here and I hope to find some clarity or at least make some friends while I'm here :)

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hallo! Just saw your post in Why Did You Join ShyBi. Welcome to the site!

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 I'm really reallyreally trying to come up with a good "a girl has no..." joke to make and it's not working. Please appreciate my effort.  :lol:

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Welcome...again. Shybi is the perfect place to discuss this sort of thing. You'll find that there are lots of women here in similar situations. This is a safe haven for many. There's a great bunch of ladies here, all very welcoming, understanding and supportive. I'm sure you'll have no trouble making friends.

My husband is also FAR from understanding and open minded, and had a bad reaction to my admission. Which is what led me here as well. How did your bf react when you told him you were attracted to women?

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Welcome to the site!  If you haven't yet, be sure to read through the site rules and other helpful posts in How Our Forum Works.

I'm sorry to hear your current boyfriend isn't very supportive.  How is that for you?  This is such an integral part of your identity.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 hours ago, Cute&Curious said:

How did your bf react when you told him you were attracted to women?

He already knew when we first met, but after a while he had asked about it and I told him I didn't think so anymore.  The end of this month makes 6 years together and we tell each other pretty much everything,  So as I became more aware of these feelings, I felt like I had to tell him, but he had some issues with exes and this subject, so I was afraid.  I told him that I had the feelings and I was afraid to tell him, but that I wouldn't do anything that would risk our relationship.  Eventually we got to the subject of him and me plus one, if that makes sense.  He was excited about it for a couple weeks.  But then something happened where we were almost in the "plus one" situation and I was afraid to act on it, so I didn't.  I think being so close to it being real scared him, and he's since been worried about it.  Especially since the particular plus one is one of my really close friends.  He says he's not worried about it anymore, but he doesn't fail to bring up that situation when we argue about things (though it's happening less and less, thankfully).

in short: he was worried, then quickly really excited, then worried again, and now in a "*shrug* it's no big deal, but i'll still bring it up as a potential issue here and there"

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
12 hours ago, BiTriMama said:

Welcome to the site!  If you haven't yet, be sure to read through the site rules and other helpful posts in How Our Forum Works.

I'm sorry to hear your current boyfriend isn't very supportive.  How is that for you?  This is such an integral part of your identity.

Lately he seems more accepting of it.  We just recently talked about our "celebrity crush lists" (plural because I make a male list and a female list), which is a fun thing we'll update each other on every few months.  I told him all the people that were on my lists the last time we talked about it have all fallen off and now there is just a list of 3 Jason Momoa's and 3 Gal Gadot's.  He thought it was cute that I kicked everyone else off the list.  We joke about "plus one" situations when we see attractive women, and he seems accepting in that way.  But it doesn't solve my feelings and that's where I'm stuck.  I don't know if those feelings should even be solved.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Welcome! You'll definitely find great support and others in similar situations here. I, for one, have been with my husband for 21 years, and we are grappling with some of the very same issues.

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 minutes ago, Spicysweet said:

Welcome! You'll definitely find great support and others in similar situations here. I, for one, have been with my husband for 21 years, and we are grappling with some of the very same issues.

Thank you, and Wow!  It makes me question what is wrong with these men?  or with society?  lol.  It definitely helps to know it's not just me.  Knowing it's so common has actually relieved tons of my stress about it.  It feels like this is so common that there must have been some misstep in how we structured relationship ideals.  Or maybe it's just the traditional ideals that I was raised on...though I never cared too much for them, rebelling against them feels wrong.

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
9 minutes ago, NoOne said:

Thank you, and Wow!  It makes me question what is wrong with these men?  or with society?  lol.  It definitely helps to know it's not just me.  Knowing it's so common has actually relieved tons of my stress about it.  It feels like this is so common that there must have been some misstep in how we structured relationship ideals.  Or maybe it's just the traditional ideals that I was raised on...though I never cared too much for them, rebelling against them feels wrong.

Oh, TOTALLY hear you there! We are reading Sex at Dawn together, which brings up a lot of those questions and has spurred some good conversations. We are also grappling with leaving behind our faith and traditional values, which is really scary. But we're in it together and our relationship has grown immensely through this process.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Spicysweet said:

Oh, TOTALLY hear you there! We are reading Sex at Dawn together, which brings up a lot of those questions and has spurred some good conversations. We are also grappling with leaving behind our faith and traditional values, which is really scary. But we're in it together and our relationship has grown immensely through this process.

That's awesome!  I wish you all the best.  That's great you guys are going through it together.  I hope me and mine can get to that place.  <3

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi @NoOne (love the name xD). I recently joined also and this seems like a great place to make friends and understand our selves in a safe environment. Wishing you all the best in your journey:)

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
18 hours ago, N00Bi said:

 I'm really reallyreally trying to come up with a good "a girl has no..." joke to make and it's not working. Please appreciate my effort.  :lol:

A girl appreciates a girl's effort :D 

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
18 hours ago, ChemFem said:

Hallo! Just saw your post in Why Did You Join ShyBi. Welcome to the site!

Thank You!!

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
29 minutes ago, Esi.luna said:

Hi @NoOne (love the name xD). I recently joined also and this seems like a great place to make friends and understand our selves in a safe environment. Wishing you all the best in your journey:)

Thank You!!  I wish you the same <3

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now