lovelace

Being a femme bisexual woman.

88 posts in this topic

5 hours ago, lovelace said:

I read a funny blog post; 'how to know if a girl likes girls', and one of the points were that they keep their nails short and clean xD it makes sense but obviously it's more hygienic in general. I always cut my nails! 

The issue of nails is quite important, I would be very put off by long and painted nails. Ouch! 

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I don't think there are a lot of bi butch women, though I do know one (who primarily dates women).  I think most are femme or somewhere in the middle.

I was more feminine than I am now when I was married (my GF teases me about trying to play it straight when she sees old pics of me), but even now, I'm somewhere in the middle.  I don't think most people would have assumed I was into women when I still identified as bi.  Now, I think it's more obvious in the way I carry myself.

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18 hours ago, Vette said:

Yes! What she said! I hate when people try to put me in a box, so I try really hard never to put anyone else in a box.

I'm a woman. I like to feel beautiful. I like to feel strong. I love to nurture others and I like being pampered. I love yelling during sports. Sometimes I do up my hair and make-up, but I usually go all natural. I wear clothes that make me feel sexy, and I wear clothes that are all about comfort.  At no point do I want to be a man, but I'm not hating the strap-on, LOL!

Unfortunately, it is difficult to find other women who are into women without putting up a neon sign, but isn't that the fun of it?  Making eye contact, watching body language, and getting the nerve to make contact. You don't always get it right, but isn't it exciting to put yourself out there a little bit?

I always get the attention of younger women and they are very bold. 

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3 hours ago, myladylove said:

The issue of nails is quite important, I would be very put off by long and painted nails. Ouch! 

This one makes me laugh every time. I understand the principle, VERY long might be an issue and obviously general care is needed. That said it's another jaded stereotype. I know a lot of women with nails who've enjoyed same-sex relationships, I've also never looked at finger nails as an indictator of sexuality. I like nails so maybe that explains a lot about the women I meet! I feel like the nail debate says more about what is going to be default in sex with a woman rather than a necessity.

@myladylove You're probably the majority... :P

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11 minutes ago, Hungry said:

That said it's another jaded stereotype. I know a lot of women with nails who've enjoyed same-sex relationships, I've also never looked at finger nails as an indictator of sexuality. I like nails so maybe that explains a lot about the women I meet! I feel like the nail debate says more about what is going to be default in sex with a woman rather than a necessity.

Nails can be a fun part of the whole experience! ;) 

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4 minutes ago, BiTriMama said:

Nails can be a fun part of the whole experience! ;) 

Preach :wub:

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As a useless data point I present more butch and have short nails but that's only because I bite them.

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16 hours ago, lovelace said:

I read a funny blog post; 'how to know if a girl likes girls', and one of the points were that they keep their nails short and clean xD it makes sense but obviously it's more hygienic in general. I always cut my nails! 

Why is it the stereotype is short nails!! I have my nails manicured every 4 weeks they are not short and beautifully painted. I love nails and I'm very obviously bi lol

And I dress how i like. Dresses if i want jeans if i want. I dont label myself but I'm sure others do as I have short hair piercings and tattoos! Now whoses stereotyping lol 

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I don't know what I am! Me? Obviously :P

 i feel woman and feminine and all that define a female although I might not show it with the way I dress. I've been called a boy in more than one occasions because people with poor eyes and brain failed to see my two girls :P and believe me they are quite visible. They saw sort hair jeans and combat boots,  which is pretty much how I dress and they assumed wrong. 

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1 hour ago, shazza21 said:

Why is it the stereotype is short nails!! I have my nails manicured every 4 weeks they are not short and beautifully painted. I love nails and I'm very obviously bi lol

And I dress how i like. Dresses if i want jeans if i want. I dont label myself but I'm sure others do as I have short hair piercings and tattoos! Now whoses stereotyping lol 

It’s not so much a stereotype as a deterrent for certain intimate practices between women.

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8 minutes ago, myladylove said:

It’s not so much a stereotype as a deterrent for certain intimate practices between women.

I still manage too with long nails ;) 

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People take insignificant things and make them huge. That is why I always tell my family to never make a big deal out of something small because then others will too. It causes mass hysteria for nothing. There are women who like short nails and others who prefer short nails. I am a Paralegal and Tax Preparer so during January to April I get the nail clippers. I do not like to be hindered in any way. 

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6 hours ago, myladylove said:

It’s not so much a stereotype as a deterrent for certain intimate practices between women.

I agree, I'm very sensitive. Most of the time when I've been fingered (sorry for the tmi) I end up sore because of a little scratch from nails by going a bit rough! 

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8 hours ago, shazza21 said:

Why is it the stereotype is short nails!! I have my nails manicured every 4 weeks they are not short and beautifully painted. I love nails and I'm very obviously bi lol

And I dress how i like. Dresses if i want jeans if i want. I dont label myself but I'm sure others do as I have short hair piercings and tattoos! Now whoses stereotyping lol 

Yep, that's the thing others will assume your sexuality either way. What really matters most is that you know yourself, though it is annoying being assumed to be straight af. 

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7 hours ago, kairi said:

I don't know what I am! Me? Obviously :P

 i feel woman and feminine and all that define a female although I might not show it with the way I dress. I've been called a boy in more than one occasions because people with poor eyes and brain failed to see my two girls :P and believe me they are quite visible. They saw sort hair jeans and combat boots,  which is pretty much how I dress and they assumed wrong. 

Yes,  its all to do with feminine energy - doesn't matter whether you are butch or femme! 

Haha that's happened to me on a couple of occasions and I was wearing the exact outfit you described! XD my hair has grown out now but I'm tempted to cut it! 

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1 hour ago, lovelace said:

Yep, that's the thing others will assume your sexuality either way. What really matters most is that you know yourself, though it is annoying being assumed to be straight af. 

Yeah they do especially if you are married. They only see straight woman but I'm happy knowing who I am

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3 hours ago, lovelace said:

I agree, I'm very sensitive. Most of the time when I've been fingered (sorry for the tmi) I end up sore because of a little scratch from nails by going a bit rough! 

I am also extremely sensitive in that area so short nails would be ‘high up’ on my list of preferences in an intimate partner.

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1 hour ago, myladylove said:

I am also extremely sensitive in that area so short nails would be ‘high up’ on my list of preferences in an intimate partner.

I think it's a lot to do with technique and practice too. I've heard from other women a lot of their uncomfortable experiences were from people rushing or just doing whatever they thought they should do rather than being guided by the other woman's body - by all means get them cut but I thought I'd mention it because it does seem to detract from enjoyment and we can't have that!

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6 hours ago, lovelace said:

Yes,  its all to do with feminine energy - doesn't matter whether you are butch or femme! 

Haha that's happened to me on a couple of occasions and I was wearing the exact outfit you described! XD my hair has grown out now but I'm tempted to cut it! 

My hair is still sort like my pic and people still label me as tomboy because of this and my clothes. Just Today a woman was judging me. I am not woman enough with my sort hair, I get dressed like a boy and should change this. She was wondering how my husband likes this image. I told her he loves boys that's why hahaha :P

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17 hours ago, kairi said:

My hair is still sort like my pic and people still label me as tomboy because of this and my clothes. Just Today a woman was judging me. I am not woman enough with my sort hair, I get dressed like a boy and should change this. She was wondering how my husband likes this image. I told her he loves boys that's why hahaha :P

I love that comeback!! xD I bet that shut her up! Your hair looks awesome!! 

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Yes it shut her up :)

And thanks for the hair. I like it that way despite the boyish look :P

Edited by kairi
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Sometimes I am the one doing the incorrect assuming.  I am femme, and for my job dress in formal business attire every day, like to look nice, make-up, jewelry, silk tops, etc.  But some of the friends I've told I'm Bi in the last couple of years have had a very muted response like "Yeah, that makes sense."  One friend even asked without me having said much of anything.  Ha!  Sometimes it's tough to know what others assume, and people who love us may be more observant than we think.  That's my experience anyways.  

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The nail thing is cracking me up. I've always had super short nails...I guess now I know why! :D I always find myself looking at other women's nails now too. Actually feeling kind of hopeful about my favorite Starbucks barista... :lol:

Edited by BellaLuna
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7 hours ago, BellaLuna said:

The nail thing is cracking me up. I've always had super short nails...I guess now I know why! :D I always find myself looking at other women's nails now too. Actually feeling kind of hopeful about my favorite Starbucks barista... :lol:

Keep in mind that food service regulations in the US (and presumably elsewhere) require that nails be kept short. Nails are absolutely not a reliable indicator for people in food service and other jobs like healthcare.

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8 hours ago, moonbynight said:

Keep in mind that food service regulations in the US (and presumably elsewhere) require that nails be kept short. Nails are absolutely not a reliable indicator for people in food service and other jobs like healthcare.

Well, darn! 

Although, I do kinda get vibes from her... no idea how reliable my gaydar is though!

Edited by BellaLuna
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