Sherry

Hello from Mass

13 posts in this topic

Hi everyone, 

 

I have been lurking around the site for months, reading posts etc. before finally deciding to join. I am 42 and discovered I was sexually attracted to women in my 20's. I considered myself to be bicurious for a long time; it seemed like safe label, not really committing to anything. However, at this stage of my life, I feel comfortable admitting at least to myself that I am way past the bicurious stage; its not just a phase, this is who I am and deserve to embrace it.  What helped helped make me more comfortable with myself was being able to tell my SO who has been understanding and supportive.  I still have feelings of guilt (not that I let it stop me!) but am so grateful that there is a safe haven for likeminded women to discuss all aspects of our sexuality. 

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Hi and Welcome!!

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Welcome

Its great when can finally let it out. I'm bisexual and it doesn't change who I am as a person

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Welcome to the site!  This is a wonderfully supportive community, which it sounds like you've figured out!  If you haven't already, be sure to check out How Our Forum Works to see the site rules and other helpful posts.

How great that your SO is supportive!  Are you planning to pursue women while you're together?

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On 2/2/2018 at 11:16 PM, BiTriMama said:

Welcome to the site!  This is a wonderfully supportive community, which it sounds like you've figured out!  If you haven't already, be sure to check out How Our Forum Works to see the site rules and other helpful posts.

How great that your SO is supportive!  Are you planning to pursue women while you're together?

Thank you!  And yes I have pursued women while we are together and plan to continue doing so! He understands that intimacy with another female is important to me yet not a threat to him.  Its totally different.  He also respects my privacy with this aspect and lets me tell him as much as I am comfortable with without prying.  Now the challenge I have is my own internal guilt. Its crazy but I feel greedy wanting the best of both worlds.  Anyone else feel that way? 

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On 2/2/2018 at 8:52 AM, shazza21 said:

Welcome

Its great when can finally let it out. I'm bisexual and it doesn't change who I am as a person

Thank you and yes its very true. 

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12 minutes ago, Sherry said:

Thank you!  And yes I have pursued women while we are together and plan to continue doing so! He understands that intimacy with another female is important to me yet not a threat to him.  Its totally different.  He also respects my privacy with this aspect and lets me tell him as much as I am comfortable with without prying.  Now the challenge I have is my own internal guilt. Its crazy but I feel greedy wanting the best of both worlds.  Anyone else feel that way? 

Yep the guilt and wanting my cake and eat it but if our men are ok with it then we shouldn't feel guilty but it is hard not too 

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You are right Shazza21 but as you said, its hard.  I was raised in a religious and slightly sexually repressive home and so my guilt runs deep, but I don't let it stop me! 

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On 2/5/2018 at 9:21 AM, Sherry said:

Thank you!  And yes I have pursued women while we are together and plan to continue doing so! He understands that intimacy with another female is important to me yet not a threat to him.  Its totally different.  He also respects my privacy with this aspect and lets me tell him as much as I am comfortable with without prying.  Now the challenge I have is my own internal guilt. Its crazy but I feel greedy wanting the best of both worlds.  Anyone else feel that way? 

I stopped feeling guilty when I realized that no matter what, I love and will always love my husband. Him being supportive should only make that love stronger. Welcome to this site, I hope that by taking to women like you can help you feel better and let you enjoy the best of both worlds!

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1 hour ago, Patrizia said:

I stopped feeling guilty when I realized that no matter what, I love and will always love my husband. Him being supportive should only make that love stronger. Welcome to this site, I hope that by taking to women like you can help you feel better and let you enjoy the best of both worlds!

Thanks so much Patrizia. Thats very true and I do love him all the more for it. :)

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I find it dso weird that husbands allow you to be with other women!  My husband believes it is cheating.  I kinda believe that but women are naturally closer I feel so I don't know.  So these husbands that allow their partners this are they still faithful to you or are they doing other stuff as well?  My husband might eventually do a threesome way in the future from the sounds of it but I don't think I could do that.  So maybe that is self fish on my part.  Guess will see what the future holds!

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39 minutes ago, JESV said:

I find it dso weird that husbands allow you to be with other women!  My husband believes it is cheating.  I kinda believe that but women are naturally closer I feel so I don't know.  So these husbands that allow their partners this are they still faithful to you or are they doing other stuff as well?  My husband might eventually do a threesome way in the future from the sounds of it but I don't think I could do that.  So maybe that is self fish on my part.  Guess will see what the future holds!

From my understanding the definition of adultery is voluntary sexual intercourse with anyone not your spouse . So technically seems to be cheating . However, another understanding of mine is sexual intercourse  via definition involves penetration usually with a penis .. soo I guess  whether it’s cheating or not is an individual personal matter . One can emotionally cheat without any physical contact also  ... interesting  to discuss and debate ! 

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