Melvie

Should I or should I not?

4 posts in this topic

So I've talked about working with my ex and how she's grooming the next girl. I'm trying to get over it (avoiding her and new girl whenever i can) but then I hear things she's saying like she told a guy who was interested to stay away and he wasn't my type. My question is should I talk to her about everything. I feel there was miscommunication and we just stopped talking to each all of a sudden. She was my first real girl fling and yes i caught feelings so I didn't know what to do when she started being strange toward me so I gave her space. She's a lesbian and knew about me. I kind of need the closer but I don' want to stir anything up either. Or should I just let well enough alone and suffer though or talk to her? I also don't want her to think I'm jealous and start the whole cold shoulder thing she has over. Im throughly confused. Any advice is wanted.

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I think at minimum you should ask her to let you speak for yourself in terms of who is and is not your type. I admit I have made similar remarks in the past but I tried to keep them restricted to what the person actually said and just relaying that. It sounds like she is taking the approach of "If I can't have you nobody can" which is a real shame.

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I agree just seems crazy since she's the one who ended things. If you moved on atleast try to let me be happy elsewhere. Thanks for the input I was definitely leaning that way.

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I think your exes behavior is sadly pretty common when you work in the same place. I agree with @ChemFem about making yourself clear, you can't let her ruin your mood or any future chances, it's pathetic. After that I would try not to speak to her too much for awhile, if she engages with you try and keep it as light and short as possible. It's also totally fine to take it one step further and say you only want to be colleagues, if she keeps butting into your business. I feel for you, I know it's tough and in an ideal world you'd want to get along, but this is about you being able to move on without her having any kind of hold on you.

Edited by Hungry
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