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Birthdays??

Friends birthday

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#1 OFFLINE   manda52panda83

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Posted 21 April 2017 - 01:36 AM

So a friend of mine's birthday is coming up and I got her a present and a card. Except I did not know that she doesn't celebrate her birthday! Ugh. Now I don't know what to do. Should I give it to her when it's not her birthday as a "non-birthday present" or just forget it altogether?! Only problem with the non-birthday thing is the card which I wrote a sappy note in. It says happy birthday all over it. What should I do? Feeling stuck.

#2 OFFLINE   BiTriMama

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Posted 21 April 2017 - 02:27 AM

It depends on her and her reasons.  For example, a friend of mine growing up is a Jehovah's Witness, and if I tried to celebrate her birthday, even in the tiniest way, it made her really uncomfortable, and seemed to undermine her religion.  If it's a preference thing, you could still give it to her, and just say, I wanted to celebrate without making it a big deal.  Happy birthday! And then leave it there.  Either way, downplay big time.

#3 OFFLINE   manda52panda83

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Posted 21 April 2017 - 02:55 AM

Good advice. Her reasoning is not due to religious beliefs. However, I do want to respect her choice. I could tell her what happened. "I got you something for your birthday before you told me you don't celebrate your birthday. I would like to give it to you because you're my friend and I think you will like it. Your birthday was just an excuse to give it to you. Please take this gift as a token of our friendship, birthday or not." Or something along those lines. Would this be a good idea?

#4 OFFLINE   SakuraGirl

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Posted 21 April 2017 - 04:06 AM

View Postmanda52panda83, on 21 April 2017 - 02:55 AM, said:

Good advice. Her reasoning is not due to religious beliefs. However, I do want to respect her choice. I could tell her what happened. "I got you something for your birthday before you told me you don't celebrate your birthday. I would like to give it to you because you're my friend and I think you will like it. Your birthday was just an excuse to give it to you. Please take this gift as a token of our friendship, birthday or not." Or something along those lines. Would this be a good idea?

Sounds like a good plan!

#5 OFFLINE   Giulia1098

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Posted 21 April 2017 - 07:08 PM

View Postmanda52panda83, on 21 April 2017 - 02:55 AM, said:

Good advice. Her reasoning is not due to religious beliefs. However, I do want to respect her choice. I could tell her what happened. "I got you something for your birthday before you told me you don't celebrate your birthday. I would like to give it to you because you're my friend and I think you will like it. Your birthday was just an excuse to give it to you. Please take this gift as a token of our friendship, birthday or not." Or something along those lines. Would this be a good idea?

That is a great idea. And whether she celebrates her birthday or not... the fact that you did something so sweet and thoughtful will surely make her smile. :)
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#6 OFFLINE   Hungry

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Posted 21 April 2017 - 07:44 PM

You're on the right track. Say less though.

Just be like I'd gotten you a gift and written a little something in the card when someone told me you don't celebrate your birthday. There's thought in the words even if you don't keep the gift :P

- Coming from someone who doesn't celebrate their birthday, you don't need to feel bad.

Edited by Hungry, 21 April 2017 - 07:45 PM.


#7 OFFLINE   manda52panda83

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Posted 22 April 2017 - 02:42 AM

View PostHungry, on 21 April 2017 - 07:44 PM, said:

You're on the right track. Say less though.

Just be like I'd gotten you a gift and written a little something in the card when someone told me you don't celebrate your birthday. There's thought in the words even if you don't keep the gift :P

- Coming from someone who doesn't celebrate their birthday, you don't need to feel bad.
I will keep it short and sweet then just like me :s I will update as soon as the time comes and I get a chance to tell her and give it to her.




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