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Omegle!


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#1 OFFLINE   romana

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Posted 16 August 2009 - 06:06 PM

So Omegle is a chat site where everyone is anonymous, supposedly, you're identified as "You" and the other is identified as "Stranger."

Needless to say, this is prime feeding ground for trolls and perverts. And countertrolls, like myself.  :hug:

http://zomegle.com/ is like bash.org for Omegle chat. I thought I'd share because hey, free comedy. :)

Quote

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Ping
Stranger: Pong
You: Ping
Stranger: Pong.
You: damn, I missed.
You: Good game!

Quote

You: Welcome to Pacman text adventure!
You: There are four ghosts in a box.
You: You can move left or right.
You: For help, type ???
You: A ghost exits the box.
You: He moves left.
You: The ghost comes down towards you.
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: ???
You: He?s close?
Stranger: oh god
You: HELP MENU
Stranger: ???
You: Type ?left? to move left or ?right? to move right.
You: One ghost is on the field.
Stranger: LEFT
You: If you need more help, see the 1980?s.
Stranger: are you crazy?

Quote

You: HEY
Stranger: hello
Stranger: why are you yelling
You: AM I?
Stranger: yes
You: HOW DO I FIX THAT?
Stranger: you should use your indoor voice
Stranger: press your caps lock button again
You: OH THANK YOU!
You: I WAS HOLDING DOWN SHIFT
You: THAT MAKES THIS SO MUCH EASIER!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Quote

You: well hello
Stranger: same
You: who in his right mind thinks that asking a random stranger "wanna fuck" will result in actual intercourse with a woman?
Stranger: someone who has never actually had sex.
You: quite possibly
Stranger: most definately.
You: so, whats your take on...<insert random topic here>
Stranger: i think that its a bit controversial to talk to a stranger about. What do you think <add response>
You: well, we can talk freely, its not like i can <violent act> you with a <blunt object>
Stranger: i'm not sure that <insert evil genius> won't be monitoring this dialogue and then <insert grizzley act>> me in a matter of moments????
You: because <person who has something to do with the topic> did a pretty good job lately <performing an action that may or may not result in a change of outcome>
Stranger: i'm not sure <person who has something to do with the topic> was solely responsible what about <insert potential accomplice>?
You: i think your are just being paranoid <insert evil genius> isnt all that bad, all those <insert acts of atrocity> he is blamed with were accidents
Stranger: wait a minute......don't tell me i should be substituting <insert potential accomplice> name with yours !!!!!!!!
You: <potential accomplice> is just a sockpuppet of <insert large corporation>
Stranger: but the <insert large corporation> is a front for the <insert non legimitate government in power>!
You: who made you think such a ludicrous idea? you shouldnt be listening to what <insert tv show> is saying
Stranger: that's what they want us to believe but <insert tv show>message is the only voice of truth/1
You: you want the truth? you cant handle the truth!
Stranger: oh i can handle it, live it and breath it...
You: <insert large corporation> and <insert non legimitate government in power> are just the beginning, soon <insert long forgotten and thought to be dead person of power> will return guiding a vast army of <insert insectoid>s
You: enslaving mankind and forcing them to <insert lewd acts> with <random being>
Stranger: me thinks you know to much are you some sort of truth seeer
Stranger: or are you somehow more involved.....
You: you dont want to know the things i had to do to get this information
You: i am trying to forget the nights in <insert obscure country>
Stranger: sometimes you just need to put your duty first...oh not not <insert obscure country>, dont take my mind back there..
You: you were there too?
You: <insert name>? is that you?
Stranger: <insert name>...oh my god...your voice in the next room was the only thing that kept me going, gave me hope.
You: i was merely just talking to the voices, i had forgotten i long was in there, eating nothing but <insert disgusting filth>
You: *how long i was
You: :)
You: what happened on <insert date> when i suddenly didnt hear you screaming anymore? i thought you were dead or <insert even worse fate>
Stranger: time meant nothing..I couldn't say. The constant interogation where they <insert horrible tortute technique>. Oh pls dont mention THAT DAY!!!
You: I had a feeling you were alive, because only a few days later they took me, drugged me and when i woke up i was in the middle of the <name of desolate place> with no water and a gigantic scar on my <insert body part>. i figured they mustve done the same to you
You: luckily i was rescued by <insert name of the good guys>
Stranger: no, no - i can't do this. I can re live this again - its not fair on any human - i need to go.....THERE COMING! I can go on knowing you are still out there.
You: they found me already passed out after i walked <insert large number> <insert measure of length> towards nowhere
You: goodgood
Stranger: keep the faith.......(trails off!!).....
You: sorry to having brought all this memories of <insert acts of war> back to you
You: i will
You: <insert obscure slogan in foreign language>, my friend
Stranger: always.......until next .....
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

For there is nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so. - Hamlet

#2 OFFLINE   DarkEyes

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Posted 16 August 2009 - 11:09 PM

View Postromana, on Aug 16 2009, 11:06 AM, said:

You: HEY
Stranger: hello
Stranger: why are you yelling
You: AM I?
Stranger: yes
You: HOW DO I FIX THAT?
Stranger: you should use your indoor voice
Stranger: press your caps lock button again
You: OH THANK YOU!
You: I WAS HOLDING DOWN SHIFT
You: THAT MAKES THIS SO MUCH EASIER!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Ah ha ha ha!  These are so cute.  I particularly liked this one, but they are all so funny.  Thank you for sharing!

#3 OFFLINE   Penumbra

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Posted 17 August 2009 - 05:32 AM

Haha. The last one was my favorite.

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#4 OFFLINE   Beach Monkey

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Posted 17 August 2009 - 06:17 AM

These are great.  Of course I had to go try Omegle for myself, and my first two attempts were lame (the first one told me I got to ask 5 questions, I asked why she was there, when she said to find a guy, I said I wasn't one but asked if she was a guy too then, she said no then left).  But the third one went like this:

Quote

Stranger: Party!
You: <Party pooper.
And then I hit the disconnect button.

Posted Image

-- Ani DiFranco, "In or Out"


#5 OFFLINE   Godiva

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Posted 18 August 2009 - 03:05 PM

I only get weird people with no sense of humour!! :P

#6 OFFLINE   romana

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Posted 19 August 2009 - 12:46 AM

Oh, but Godiva, those are the best ones to play with!  :)

My favourite thing is when they say m/f, i say "both"
For there is nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so. - Hamlet

#7 OFFLINE   Godiva

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Posted 19 August 2009 - 05:17 PM

I might give it another go then...I obviously need to unleash my evil side! :D